Forever Me

Nothing Is Really Perfect 4 PART 2

2010-12-03T04:58:00.000-08:00

After her talk with Yasmeen, Jenna stormed out of the house with a soul full of rage. She felt betrayed by her husband. Especially at Dalia. How could she sneak off to see 3bdullah behind Jenna's back? Did she really need this right now? After all, they were trying to conceive.

Speaking of Dalia and 3bdullah..

Dalia: let's go..
3bdullah: Seriously? It's only been ten minutes.
Dalia: He... umm... didn't show up...
3bdullah: Did you try calling him?
Dalia: His phone's off.. it's ok.. just please take me home..
3bdullah: I'm sorry Dee...
Dalia: It's fine 3adi, just take me home.

7aram wallah. She was really looking forward to seeing Faisal. But that's ok, atleast two of the four were going to see eachother. And hey, it might even end with a big bang too.

Jennah was on her feet moving constantly back and fourth in the living room. She couldnt wait for 3bdullah to get home to give him a piece of her mind.

3bdullah: 7beebty you home?
Jennah: Ana bl 9alah..
3bdullah: Halah 7beebty kfk? how was your day..
Jennah: Awwh look at you all perky and happy and cheery..
3bdullah: Ok whats wrong with you? You've got that weird look on your face.
Jennah: What did you do today?
3bdullah: Nothing just.... went by the office nothing new.
Jennah: Oh i bet nothing's new!!
3bdullah: Ok that's it I've had it Jay! What is wrong with you?!!
Jennah: Me? Your the one sneaking off with my sister behind my back! So YOU tell me what the hell's going on?!!
3bdullah: Ya Rabiii....
Jennah: Oh yeah you better pray!!
3bdullah: Dalia likes this guy and she wasn't ready to tell any of you just yet and for some reason she felt that she could talk to me. So she asked me to drop her off and then drop her back home. I said ok cause she seemed so happy with this guy and when did we ever see Dalia like that? I didn't mean to hide it from you but she told me to promise not to tell.
Jennah: Mmhmm.. and what about the late night texts?
3bdullah: That was all related to the guy she likes... wait! have you been snooping through my fhone?! How long has this been going on?!!
Jennah: Dont you dare turn this around on me !!
3bdullah: I'm not turning anything! This is the truth! And you know what Jay, I honestly I'm sick and tired of all of this. Your mood lately has been giving me hell. Any guy in my shoes would have walked away! And my God it's like you don't even trust me anymore!!
Jennah: So your leaving me?
3bdullah: No Jay... I just need some time to think. I'll grab a few of my clothes and stay at a hotel. There's no need for anyone to know. Ma nby netfashal.
Jennah: Ummm but when will you be back?
3bdullah: I dunno we'll see.

Meanwhile Yasmeen called 3bdul3ziz to pick her up. And on their way home she got some goodish badish news ?

3bdul3ziz: Hey you ok?
Yasmeen: Yup couldnt be better..
3bdul3ziz: Well your about to 7beebty. From now on we got the whole house to ourselves.
Yasmeen: What? What do you mean? Where's 7amad?
3bdul3ziz: And here i was thinking you'd scream with joy.
Yasmeen: 3ziz Im serious where is 7amad !!
3bdul3ziz: I dont know. All he sent me was a text saying he'll be gone for a few days and i tried calling him but his phone is switched off.
Yasmeen: Oh my God...
3bdul3ziz: What?
Yasmeen: Nothing I'm just so glad we have the house to ourselves.. yay...

She was depressed. She never thought 7amad would result to leaving. Guilt was eating her whole body up. She knew she over exajurated in the car today. And letting this go, forgetting was not an option for her. She knew she had to make it right but how? Where is 7amad?

Once they got home 3bdul3ziz dimmed the lights in the bedroom and waited for Yasmeen. When she got upstairs chills went running all over body. He pulled her towards him and started undressing her. He was her husband so there was no reason for her to stop him. So she went along with it. That night she gave herself to him yet again.

The next morning she woke up and found a message from 7amad saying:

I'm sorry for how I acted yesterday. If it's not too much i'd like to see you tonight. get back to me soon.

Do I lie and say that she wasnt too happy about the message? Because she was beyond thrilled. She was up half the night worrying about him!

As for Dalia... well she woke up to quit a surprise aswell. As she headed down to the kitchen to fix herself something to eat she got a knock on the door.

Faisal: You don't have to say it. I already know what your thinking. I feel so bad about yesterday.
Dalia: If you couldnt make it why didnt you just call me?
Faisal: Dalool wallah i wanna answer that question but for now your gonna have to trust me...
Dalia: is there another girl?
Faisal: No! Haha God no it's just you. but for now your gonna have to just take my word that it was important.
Dalia: Ok I believe you. Now run along before my parents see you..
Faisal: I'll call you in a bit..

NEW POST TOMORROW !! ;*******
OH AND PLEASE THOSE OF YOU WHO DIDNT JOIN MY OTHER BLOG PLEASE JOIN http://learn--live--love.blogspot.com/

Nothing Is Really Perfect 4 PART 1

2010-12-02T10:46:00.000-08:00

i RE posted part 1 cuz mdrii shfeeh egoul some parts are covered in white ;/ .. so for this post ama make it all in dark purple. the next one will be ok. al7een im off to writing part 2. ;*****

The next morning Jenna woke up and decided to forget about what she saw last night. She didnt want to jump to conclusions and if 3bdullah knew she was snooping through his phone late at night, he'd get so mad at her. And right now thats not what either of them needs. So she let it go. She called Yasmeen and they both decided to meet at their parents house.

Yasmeen: You ok?....... ok see you in a bit bye.
7amad: Everything ok?
Yasmeen: Were you evesdropping on me?!
7amad: Well... it depends on what you mean by evesdropping...
Yasmeen: Goodbye 7amad...
7amad: He's asleep by the way!
Yasmeen: I know but i hate driving and I need him to drop me off.
7amad: Im on my way out anyways so i can take you.
Yasmeen: No.
7amad: Ouch just a flat out no just like that? i'm 3bdul3ziz's brother I wont hurt you.
Yasmeen: Fine, but im sitting in the back.

A while later 3bdullah woke up and checked his phone. he found a miss call from Dalia so he called her back.

Dalia: THANK GOD !
3bdullah: You scared me! Are you ok?
Dalia: Yeah Im fine but its about Faisal! He wants me to see him today and i dont know how. I know this is so wrong to ask but can you drop me off then come back to pick me up? I'd ask my sisters but I just dont wanna tell them yet.
3bdullah: I dunno Dalool.. a5af yseerlik shay.
Dalia: Aw3dk ma ra7 yseer shay.. just for an hour please!
3bdullah: Ok fine but just this once.
Dalia: Ah thank you so much 3abood! pick me up in an hour!

Meanwhile Yasmeen was very uncomfortable being in the car with 7amad. Nothing "oh gross" kind of uncomfortable. But the "shy/nervous" kind of uncomfortable. Although she was just staring outside the car, she could sense that he was staring at her the entire time.

Yasmeen: Will you please stop staring at me..
7amad: I'm sorry but...
Yasmeen: But what?
7amad: You just seem tense.
Yasmeen: I'm just not used to sitting in the back EVER.
7amad: Oo laish eta3been nafsik? T3ali oo bs.
Yasmeen: Fine, but this is only because my ass is killing me!
7amad: And what a fine ass it is.
Yasmeen: DONT PUSH IT !

She tried to close the door shut but it wouldnt. After a few tries, 7amad leaned in over Yasmeen and pulled in the strap of her purse that was stuck inbetween the door. But as he leaned back he paused for a moment to look at Yasmeen's face. The two were frozen for a moment.

Yasmeen: I have to leave!
7amad: What?! Are you crazy were in the middle of the street!!
Yasmeen: I'll get a taxi whatever.. Bye!
7amad: I'm sick of your crap Yasmeen!

And he left her there. In the middle of nowhere. Yasmeen hates to drive so she didnt really know where she was or where to go. So she just stood in her place until she found a taxi.

She felt so hurt by 7amad. What he did was cruel and she didn't really know wether to forgive him or not. Was there a reason to all of this?

Back at The girl's parents house, Jenna and Dalia were sitting in the living room. As curious as Jennah was towards Dalia, she tried her very best to not say a single word.

Dalia: Hey can you get me some coke ?
Jenna: Get it yourself.
Dalia: I would but were all out and I dunno where mama put the storage room key.
Jenna: Agh fine!

The second Jennah was out of sight Dalia grabbed her things and quietly got out of the house. 3bdullah was waiting for her in the car. But if Dalia thinks Jenna was completely out of sight, she better think again.

An hour later Yasmeen finally made it to her parents house.

Jenna: I called you a million times why did you switch off your phone?!
Yasmeen: I thought it was hard to find cabs at night. As it turns out it works both ways too. Do you know how disgusting they are? The smell! Oh God the smell!
Jenna: What the hell are you going on about?!!! i
Yasmeen: I was going to wake up 3bdul3ziz to drop me off her. He was asleep so 7amad insisted. I sat in the back because I didnt wanna be upfront with him. I gave in later on cause I wasn't comfortable back there. So I sat upfront and my purse's strap was caught in the door so he leaned in to i dunno fix it or whatever. So i got out of the car and he drove off.
Jenna: That's it?
Yasmeen: Ummm when he was about to lean back he like stopped and we started staring at eachother......
Jenna: You didnt... that.... did you?
Yasmeen: NO! See that's why i got outta the car!
Jenna: Do you like him or something?
Yasmeen: Hell no! The guy drives me insane!

Jenna: You've got issues. Anyways guess what? out beloved sister just sneaked out of the house and got into the car with my husband.

Yasmeen: What? Are you blinde? She could have snuck out with anyone!

Jenna: She's constantly messaging my husband and i saw him just now ! Why would I be making this up!

Yasmeen: I guess its gonna be a long time for you two.

Jenna: is that even supposed to be funny?

You guys this is the end of part one of this post. part two tomorrow inshallah. Cause i'm connecting both these posts. love you all and goodnight. I hope you liked part one, min zamaaaan mani katbaaa oo a7s thy3a shway.

;**************

Wow Has It Really Been That Long?

2010-11-30T11:09:00.000-08:00

It's been so long since i've been back on blogger. God I've missed it so much! But most of all I've missed EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU!!
I know its been a while and i'm sorry. But Uni has given me hell the past 2 months. Bs el7mdelah now i'm back on track. Oo nshallah i'll have a mini post for you by Thursday. Shway shway oo I'll be posting long ones. Laman agdar I'll post whatever I can. Oo like I always say, i'll try to post more often bs sam7oony if i dont.

I LOVE YOU all so much !! ;********************

Do U Blame Me? ;(

2010-10-18T07:30:00.000-07:00

I was so sure I would have time to post over the weekend but I couldn't !
Friday was the absolute worst! I was up from 11 am till 9 pm working non stop!
Aghh!! Plus next week I have a test and quiz. And tomorrow I have a quiz !!
Ed3oooooliiiiiiiiii please!
I won't make any promises this time. But I will post whenever I can. The second I can, I'll post.
I love you all and you guys have no idea as to how much I miss you !!
I miss the comments and writing and EVERYTHING !!
I'll post as soon as I can !
Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa77777777777 !!! ;*********

- I just hope I didn't let anyone down

Aghhh !! :(

2010-10-10T11:19:00.000-07:00

You guys wallah I'm so so SO sorry!! It's my 3rd week at uni and its so hectic. I'm still trying to get used to it all. And I'm so stressed out. And my body emkaser eb shekl mu 6beeeeeeeeeeee3y !!
I really do wanna post bs if I do now, then I wont be able to give you my best effort.
So please bare with me. This week is especially insane! Bs inshallah this weekend you guys will get a LONG post! :)
Oh and just to keep you on your toes a bit more ;p ...... Something it going to happen a bit later on that will totally have you in disbelief. Yeah some of you have a sense of what is gonna happen. But "this" i doubt you've seen it coming. You know how I like my drama heheh ;D
I'm sure you guys are gonna love it! You know how I like to have my twists and turns ;p
I love you all oo please ed3oliiiiiiiiii ;***

Nothing Is Ever Really Perfect 3

2010-09-24T09:25:00.000-07:00

I want comments or else I wont post.. hehehehe.. (A)

The next morning Jenna had a follow up appointment with her doctor. She was now going to finally know what was really wrong with her and if there are any possible treatments.

Jenna and 3bdullah have been trying to conceive a child for over a year now, but nothing was happening. They went and spoke with a doctor and it turns out Jenna was infertile. Her infertility was caused by a medical condition she has had. Not long ago she was diagnosed with Premature Ovarian Failure. She was having irregular periods, that was caused by the built in stress she was holding. At that time Jenna and 3bdullah were having alot of problems. This went on for months. But luckily they got passed all that. (you'll know more about what happened in the past in later posts.)

While at her follow up appointment, her doctor suggested a few treatments which he hoped would take effect. He suggested three. One which would be for her to maintain a more healthy lifestyle. Going to the gym, eating more healthier, and try to manage her stress and emotions. And in two months if that doesn't work, he would subscribe her with medication to induce ovulation.

But if the drugs don't help either, then she would have to have artificial insemination to produce multiple eggs. This process is called super ovulation.

It's such a low percentage for woman to be infertile in their early twenties. Most woman have that problem in their late thirties. Poor Jenna, let's just hope theres a light at the end of this dark tunnel.

3bdullah: So that's it ?!

Jenna: E7mad rabik we have 3 options!! Or would you rather me staying infertile forever?

3bdullah: I'm sorry babe.. I just really want a baby..

Jenna: And I don't? I'm a woman! I want it more than you do ok! So stop giving me crap and leave me the hell alone!

3bdullah: This is my house Jenna! Where the hell am I supposed to go ?!

Jenna: I don't care! But for now just get out of my sigh!

3bdullah: Your being a child right now! I did nothing wrong!

Jenna: That's what you men always say! Just leave!

Meanwhile Dalia was still mad at herself for what she did last night. Out of no where blurting out everything she felt. She looked like such a fool! And what's killing her even more is that it's her friend's birthday today, meaning Faisal would definitely be there. She could easily back out. But then how would she look in front of one of her closest friends? She's just going to have to suck it up and pray for the next day.

RING RING !!!
INCOMING CALL: 3BDULLAH AL-X

Dalia: Hallah 3bdullah.

3bdullah: Oh Dalia? Haha I'm sorry, I thought I dialed the right number.

Dalia: No worries. How are you?

3bdullah: Ahh.. how am I? Well your sister just kicked me out of my own living room so take a guess.

Dalia: Oh yay! I feel like crap too!

3bdullah: Hahahahahah!! 3asa ma shar?

Dalia: Well...

They chatted for about an hour telling each other what was going on. They both managed to give some comforting words of advice. A friendship soon began to bloom between 3bdullah and Dalia.

Later that night at her friends birthday dinner on her way out to leave someone grabs her my the arm.

It was Faisal.

Not even giving her a chance to speak, he pulled in to him and kissed her. It was a gentle soft romantic kiss. It was the perfect kiss.

Dalia's arms were held by her sides. She didn't even know what do it. It hit her so fast. So unexpected.

Dalia: I.. I.. I.. I.. I..

Faisal: Shh! It's my turn to talk. You don't know how long I've been waiting to do that. Dalia I've never once not noticed you those past 4 years. I notice and I stare. I've never tried approaching you because I've always thought you hated me. I didn't wanna look like an idiot in front of you. I didn't wanna take that chance. To me it's better to be a stranger rather than an idiot you laugh at. Every time I see you smile you don't know how much it makes me happy!! You think you don't drive me insane? YOU DO DALIA!!! I've never looked at another girl. The minute I layed eyes on you, I knew you were different. Your gorgeous, intelligent, funny.. I mean what more could I ever want? I regret not saying a word to you all those years, and I'm so sorry. But here I am now, and I'm telling you... I want you. I want all of you to be mine.

Dalia: Yes.. A thousand times yes!

Faisal: Ahh thank god!!

Dalia: Hahaha!! You don't know how happy this just made me Faisal!!

Faisal: All I wanna see is that smile that takes my breath away.

Dalia: So are you gonna drive your girl home or what?

Faisal: My girl...

But oh poor little Yasmeen. She was going insane alright.

In a silent house in a silent living room were sitting 3 DEAD silent people.

Yasmeen sitting over by the window going through her magazine. 3bdul3ziz sitting on his favorite lazy boy staring at the wall. And our 7amad cracking his knuckles over and over again lying on the couch.

Yasmeen: WILL YOU STOP !!

7amad: 5air wsh tbeen ?!

Yasmeen: Your annoying us !!

3bdula3ziz: Oh I'm not annoyed sweetie. Your on your own.

Yasmeen: Seriously? Your still upset about the other night?

3bdul3ziz: You left behind your own husband. How do you expect me to be right now?

Yasmeen: Oh my god.. I'm not gonna let you tell me what to wear. Thats gonna be first! Then it's gonna be you telling me where and not to go! NO 3ZIZ! I will not be like one of those wives having their husbands walk all over them!!

3bdul3ziz: 7beebty who said anything about me taking away any privileges you have? I just didn't want you to go looking dressed down.

Yasmeen: This is my family's house. It doesn't matter what I wear !

3bdul3ziz: Alright I'm sorry.. I didn't know you felt that way. But 7beebty Yasmeen you have to know that I would never try to make you miserable. All I want is for you to be happy. And I never wanna take that away from you. I love you.

Yasmeen: I think I'm gonna call it a night. Goodnight 7amad.

3bdul3ziz: Yasmeen..

Yasmeen: I'll be fine.. I just wanna get some rest.

7amad: Let her cool down. She'll be ok..

A few minutes later 7amad went up to check on Yasmeen. Although he wasn't a big fan of her this night, he still felt sorry for her and wanted to make sure she was ok.

7amad: Hey you ok sweetie?

Yasmeen: I'm really not in the mood..

7amad: I just wanted to make sure you were ok. You seemed mad as hell down there.

Yasmeen: I still am.

7amad: I know.. but listen try not to give the guy a hard time. You don't know how much he loves you. And I know he meant every word he said.

Yasmeen: Your a good guy you know that?

7amad: Haha that's why the ladies love me sweetie

Yasmeen: Hahahahahahaah!! Your so full of yourself. Oh hey I wanted to ask you.. how old are you?

7amad: Older than your man in 3 years. So.. 27.

Yasmeen: Wow I must be a kid compared to you..

7amad: Nah your not a kid. Your one hell of a kid.

Yasmeen: Haha go on just get out of my room.

7amad: Hey I'm serious. Listen to me. If I had a girl like you, I'd be lucky as hell. I wouldn't let a day go by seeing you upset. My brother's a luckily guy. I'd LITERALLY kill for a girl like you.

Yasmeen: 7amad --

7amad: It's late. Sweet dreams Yasmeen.

Yasmeen: O....kay.. well that was awkward.

Later that night Dalia got a text message from 3bdullah.

Sooooooooo ?!!!!

OMG!! U DONT KNOW HOW HAPPY I AM!! :D :D :D

LOOOOL!! I'm glad :)

What about u and Jay ?

She's still pissed at me for no reason ;s .. i just wanna strangle her !!

Looool!! I know exactley how you feel. Get used to it dude it aint goin away ;p

Allah ystr ;p

Arn't u guys supposed to be coming over tomorrow?

Yupp.. but let's see if the queen wants to speak to me first ;p

AKEEEEEEED!! All hail queen jay ;p loool

LOOOOOOOOOOL!!! Your adorable.. goodnight ;**

I know (A) See you tomorrow.

3bdullah went straight to bed after that. Jenna was still cleaning up the dinner table downstairs. Once she got up she changed into her Pj's and got into bed.

But before she could rest her head on the pillow, she herd 3bdulla's phone vibrate.

She instantly got up to see who it was from, the litte nosy person she is.

It was a message from Dalia.

Jenna was shocked. Since when did they start becoming buddies?

She was a little upset and confused.

But tommorow is another day, which takes upon new drama.

AWWWWWWWHHHH He just send me a kiss saying goodnight!!
3aboood wallah I'm going insane !! :D

What's Jenna gonna do next? An outburst of anger could easily be harmful. Let's not forget, she is trying to have a child. And stress right now is not going to help.

_________________________________________

PLEASE join me on my other blog. Lalish only 9 of you followed ;'''(
Ma t7booonii ??
Yalla 3afya join :)

http://learn--live--love.blogspot.com/

Nothing Is Ever Really Perfect 2

2010-09-19T09:53:00.000-07:00

Omg im so sorry!! I accidently put yasmeen in the first line. Its supposed to be Dalia!! Im re posting this to correct it!! Thank you Halla for pointing it out and you guys im sorry for any confusion !! ;**

Dalia was always the type that knew what she wanted and always found a way to get it. Only this time she was nailed down on her feet. No boy has ever made her feel this way. Except for him. Except for Faisal. You see this guy had her totally under his spell. All it took was one little smile to drive Dalia insane.

Is not like they were strangers. They've seen each other so many times but never officially sat down and actually got to know each other.

You see they were together all through college. Shared almost all the same classes. And had many mutual friends, meaning they would see each other anywhere at anytime. But still, he never really took the time to see what was really around him.

Until today.

Dalia: Thank's Yasmeen !

Yasmeen: WAIT !! Hey where are you going taw el nas ?

Dalia: I'm meeting the girls for dinner.

Yasmeen: Is that all you do?! It's like you have no time for anything anymore!

Dalia: Hahahaha! Excuse me? Don't blame me just cause I didn't get married too young and throw my life away.

Yasmeen: What's that supposed ---

And then in walks 7amad in his navy blue boxers with his hair all messed up.

7amad: Morning ladies..

Yasmeen: It's 8 pm smarty.

7amad: Oh wow!! Oh and hello there..

Yasmeen: 7amad this is my sister Dalia, Dalia this is 3ziz's brother 7amad.

Dalia: Hi..

7amad: Well I would have definitely remembered you from the wedding.

Just as Dalia starts giggling, Yasmeen starts pushing her towards the door until she was out of 7amad's sight. They said their goodbyes and then Yasmeen headed back into the living room to find 7amad making himself "too comfortable" on the couch. He had his dewania position a little too legs spread. That which made Yasmeen very uncomfortable.

Yasmeen: I'm sorry but can you please change into something a little more appropriate?

7amad: I'm at my home, so this is home friendly.

Yasmeen: Uh no no no.. this is MY house and this is NOT Yasmeen friendly. So please go and change into something a bit more me friendly.

7amad: Alright fine... oh hey I wanted to ask you about Dalia.

Yasmeen: Speaking of her, the flirting? Really?

7amad: Oh c'mon I was being friendly.

Yasmeen: Whatever..

7amad: Hey where are you going come back here.. Yallah 3ad don't be a bitch!

Yasmeen: Your the only bitch around here sweetie!

Meanwhile, after dinner with her friends Dalia sat back and waited for her driver. He was late as usual. So she ordered herself some chocolate ice cream.

Not so long after a familiar face walks in. Straight to the counter to ask for the takeaway menu.

SPLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT !!!!!!!!!

Dalia's knees jumped up with excitement from under the table the ice cream splattered all over her.

Someone took notice of the accident and the *person*

Faisal: Umm are you ok?

Dalia: No I'm not ok! I have ice cream all over me and I'm freezing!

Faisal: Haha calm down Dalia. C'mon let's get you cleaned up.

Dalia: Wait, what did you just say?

Faisal: Dalia.. that is your name right?

Dalia: Yeah it is but we never actually spoke so...

Faisal: I've seen you around and we do have the same friends so your name is bound to come to my attention.

Dalia: Right... anyways thanks for whatever your doing haha but I gotta get going..

Faisal: What were you doing here alone?

Dalia: Oh I just finished dinner with some friends so I was waiting for my driver...

Faisal: Oh ok.. well take care.

Dalia: Yeah you too.

She walked out of the restaurant hear broken! This was her first impression given to her crush and she blew it terribly!

Her driver still wasn't outside and going back inside was not even an option for her. So she sat out on the steps and waited. She kept re playing what had just happened. Dreaming of what she could have done different.

But Faisal soon popped that little bubble she was in.

Faisal: Hey you..

Dalia: Oh hey..

Faisal: I thought you had to go. or was that just an excuse to leave.

Dalia: Turns out he wasn't here.

Faisal: I'm sorry but did I do something wrong?

Dalia: Yeah you did actually..

Faisal: Ok.. I'm sorry?

Dalia: No your not sorry! Because you don't even know what you did! What you've done to me!

Faisal: What the hell are you talking about ?!!

Dalia: ME!!! We've been at the same college for 4 years and never once have you noticed me!! We've been put in several group projects and never once have you looked my way!! Were out at all the same places every single day and never once have you said hi!! Sure from time to time you smile my way but I don't even know if its intended for me!! That smile kills me every time I see it!! You make me blush every time I see you!! You Faisal YOU drive me insane!! I don't know how you do but you do!! And the funny thing is you don't even know what your doing to me!!

The funny thing is that she wasn't even done. But her driver did save her on time before Faisal could open his mouth.

Dalia went to bed that night feeling so humiliated. She couldn't believe the words that came out of her mouth. It was like someone had taken over her, releasing the word's she always wanted to say.

But exactly what will happen now?

That night she cried herself to sleep.

The next morning Jenna had a follow up appointment with her doctor. She was now going to finlay know what was wrong with her and if their were any treatments.

I know the posts arn't that long as always. But this time I have more characters meaning more of everything. So I sometimes cant have all the characters in one post. But it's kinda nice in a way if you think about it. With not too much information put all together, it gives you time to slolwy take in everything. I just don't wanna confuse you guys and throw everything at you all at once. I think this way its best. This way you guys can get to know the characters much more easily and better.

Oh and don't forget to follow me on my other blog!!!!

http://learn--live--love.blogspot.com/

New Blog !!

2010-09-18T04:30:00.001-07:00

My pretties !!
I just created a new blog.. but dont worry this doesnt mean I will be shutting this one down.. HELL NO ;P

They will BOTH be activated at the same time and updated so often !

The "Welcome" post on the blog will fill you in ..

So heres the link.. check it out and please follow !! I need you all there.. I couldnt possibly post without any of you.. I love you too much ;**

http://learn--live--love.blogspot.com/

Nothing Is Ever Really Perfect 1

2010-09-14T13:48:00.000-07:00

I have all the colors planned out for each character. But for first couple of posts I'm gonna put their names and in a while I'll stop putting them. And I'm planning at the beginning of each post (for a while) I'll write down the characters names and their colors. So what do you guys think? Oh and you guys before you read this post, I suggest you read the introduction again. ;*

Jennah - Pink
3bdullah - Blue

Yasmeen - Purple
3bdul3ziz - Green

Dalia - Orange

Mom/Haifa - Red
Dad/3ali - Grey

And additional characters will be black.

ENJOY THE FIRST POST AND I'M EXPECTING ALOT OF COMMENTS OR ELSE I WONT POST PART 2 .. HEHEHE <3

________________________________________

Jenna: Are you ready? Were gonna be late!!

3bdullah: Ha ha yallah I'm here!!

Jenna: Where's the carrot cake ?

3bdullah: Damn I forgot to pick it up Jay wallah I'm sorry..

Jenna: Deep breath Jennah, deep breath. Ok.. were gonna pick one up on our way.

3bdullah: 7beebty are you ok ?

Jenna: I'm just a little upset but it's ok. We'll just pick some up.

3bdullah: Are you sure your mom wont be upset if were late?

Jenna: Of course not! She never starts dinner with the dining table half empty.

3bdullah: It's gonna be ok Jenna.. I promise you were gonna find a way.. just relax and try to enjoy tonight..

Jenna: How could I possibly have a good time when theres a chance a might not be able to have children !!!!

So the "happy couple" stopped by a bakery and then made their way over to Haifa's house. (her mother)

Meanwhile on the other side of the city, another couple were having trouble. But their trouble wouldn't allow them to leave the house.

Yasmeen: 3bdullah it's my family's house! They don't care what I wear as long as I'm there!

3bdullah: Jeans and t-shirt I'd understand but a training suit!!

Yasmeen: This is Juicy Couture !!

3bdullah: Please would you just go on and put on something decent to wear !!

Yasmeen: Juicy is decent!! You can wear it anywhere!!

3bdullah: Your my wife!!

Yasmeen: And that does not give you the right to make these choices for me!! I'm not changing, end of story!!

3bdullah: Dinner is in an hour Yasmeen!!

Yasmeen: Oh you poor dear, did you really think I wasn't gonna go without your permission?

3bdullah: What's that supposed to mean?

Yasmeen: It means I'm leaving with or without you! Tah tah lover..

And that's exactly what she did. 3bdullah didn't even bother following her either.

That's the way it was with the two of them for the past couple of weeks. Non stop fighting.

Finlay everybody arrived at Haifa's house where they all sat down to a lovely dinner. Nobody brought up why 3bdullah wasn't at dinner, everyone they were having trouble. As for Jenna's problem trying to get pregnant, well only her mother knew about that. She was too embarrassed to have her whole family know.

After dinner they all sat down for tea and cake in the living room.

3bdullah and 3ali (the father) went and sat outside by the pool and discussed their business lives.

Jenna and her mom Haifa were chatting away about doctors and possible solutions.

As for Yasmeen and Dalia, well they couldn't stop going on and on about their love lives.

Dalia: It's just so annoying! I don't know whether to go for it or...

Yasmeen: How does this guy make you feel ?

Dalia: I don't know, but I can't stop smiling every time he's around.

Yasmeen: Awww Dee that's so adorable! So make a move already!

Dalia: Are you insane?! Every girl in the city wants a piece of him. I don't stand a chance.

Yasmeen: You don't stand a chance? Really? Sweetie you just told me that he wouldn't stop looking at you last night!

Dalia: I know I know but I can't !! You should see the way I stutter whenever he's around me. I go insane!

Yasmeen: Hahaha you call that insane? You should have seen the fight I had with "him" before I came here!

Dalia: Oh c'mon you can say his name!

Yasmeen: I just ate, don't make me throw up. It's enough that I have to go back to him at the end of the night.

Dalia: Ummm.. when was the last time you guys had... you know...

Yasmeen: Sex?

Dalia: SHHHHHHH!!! They'll hear you!!

Yasmeen: Oh who cares.. Ummm I don't know a month ago.

Dalia: Your gonna have to make it work with him. I mean no offence but he's the one putting in all the effort. And you know he's crazy in love with you.

Yasmeen: You think I don't know that! I'm trying wallah I am. I just need time.

Dalia: Allah yehdeeki..

After 11, everybody called it a night and headed home. But Dalia was fresh out of college so she was still living with her parents.

She headed on up to her bedroom and began writing her post of the day...

Another dinner with same ol' family.. :)
Don't get me wrong, I adore them but I mean c'mon! Let's do something knew once in a while. It's always dinner and tea, dinner and tea!
Helloooooooo?!! BORING!!
Oh and speaking of "him".. I saw him again and as always he keeps me wanting more!
I was thinking, why should I wait for him to make the first move? Why cant I? Theres no rule about this sort of stuff.
So there I've know decided. Tomorrow I'm calling him up and telling him how I feel.
I sure hope "Y" is right about this. Otherwise she'll be the one served for dinner next week. :)
That's all for boring Sunday.
- xx

Hoping she'd avoid 3bdul3ziz for the night and jump right into bed, Yasmeen had something else waiting for her back at home.

The second she walked in she was greeted by a hug from 3bdulaziz. And standing right behind him was a handsome man who instantly caught Yasmeen's eyes.

3bdul3ziz: 7beebty this is my brother 7amad. He just flew in from L.A.

Yasmeen: Ahaa.. ahlain. Umm you didn't tell me we were gonna have company. Otherwise I would have fixed up the guest bedroom.

7amad: La wallah it's ok. I booked a suit at the hotel.

3bdul3ziz: No brother of mine is staying a hotel. Your staying here I insist!

7amad: Haha ok 5ala9 it's settled.

Yasmeen: I'll go fix up the bedroom.

A Few Minutes Later...

Yasmeen: Ahh! You scared me!!

7amad: Hehe sorry. Is my room all ready?

Yasmeen: Yeah just finished. Goodnight.

7amad: Hey hey hold up. Sit down for a minute.

Yasmeen: What's up?

7amad: You don't remember me do you?

Yasmeen: Your my husbands brother.

7amad: No.. I mean at the wedding. I was the one who tripped and fell on you!

Yasmeen: Oh my god! Hahahahahaha that was you?!

7amad: Haha yeah!

Yasmeen: Sorry haha but I didn't really pay much attention at the wedding. I wasn't feeling so well that day oo knt emtan7a 6oul el leel wallah.

7amad: Besmelah 3leeki.

Yasmeen: It was all caught on video you know..

7amad: Amma 3ad?! I have to watch it.

Yasmeen: Inshallah... anyways it's getting late so I better go.

7amad: Yasmeen?

Yasmeen: Yeah?

7amad: Sweet dreams..

3eedkm Mbarik !!! :D

2010-09-10T01:00:00.000-07:00

Kl sana oo entom b5aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaair !!!!!!

I love you all so much !!!!!!!!

Have an amazing 3eid with your loved ones <3

Inshallah I'll have a post for you guys once 3eid is over.. mmm I'm hoping to have it done on Wednesday.

;*****************

Nothing Is Ever Really Perfect INTRODUCTION

2010-09-04T19:03:00.000-07:00

How do you really begin a story? Do we start off by saying "Once upon a time..." , or what? Hmm.. how about I just introduce the characters and we'll be on our way.

I'm going to tell you about a charming couple, Haifa and 3ali. It really was love at first sight for these two. They met one summer in California and instantly hit it off. They got married a year after they met and not too long after they had a daughter. A beautiful baby named Jenna.

Jenna was the perfect little angel. Got all high marks and got accepted to all the amazing Universities including Harvard and Yale. In the end her heart and mind was set on Studying law at Harvard. But when she got back home, she realized her true passion was art. So she attended the London School of Art for a year. Once back home she opened up a little art gallery which luckily for her took off right away.

On a night of one of her exhibitions, Jenna met 3bdullah. He was a businessman looking into buying a painting for his new house. Jenna tried avoiding him all night being so shy and all but 3bdullah eventually caught up to her and asked her out to dinner. And from that dinner came many more, until one night he proposed to her and gave her the dream wedding she's always wanted.

Now at 25, Jenna and 3bdullah are still madly in love trying to conceive a child.

Two years after Jenna was born, Yasmeen came along. She was the most moody one. The one that was always hard to please. But non the less, everyone adored her. After graduating college she decided to move to America. But her parents refused since nothing was waiting for her all the way on the other side of the globe. Yasmeen never fell in love, not once. Many eligible men came asking for her hand after hearing many wonderful things about her, but she rejected each and every one of those men. Not even one of them seemed like Mr. Perfect.

Haifa, her mother was devastated. She always prayed to God that someone would come and sweep her off her feet.

So one day a handsome man named 3bdul3ziz came wanting Yasmeen's hand in marriage. His mother had told him about Yasmeen and he figured "Hey why not? It's about time I settled down anyways". He felt an immediate attraction towards her. The only problem was that Yasmeen felt nothing at all. It was as if she was numb inside. But seeing how devastated her mother got every time she turned down a man, she couldn't bare doing that to her again. So this time she accepted the proposal. Yasmeen and 3bdl3ziz were married a year later. God only knows of she's living in misery or in bliss.

The youngest of them was Dalia. She was the most fun to be around. She had this vibrant energy whenever she walked into a room. At 21, she had just finished college and has no plans into going after her masters. One of her many talents was writing. So she started her very own blog and was constantly on it 24/7. No one knew about it other than her mom. She knew everybody else would think it's silly and pointless. Sure she's had crushes on guys but never actually thought any of them were worth going after. As she always says, "Someday he'll come, and here I'll wait patiently". She was known as the hopeless romantic daughter. Standing next to Yasmeen who was the unknown, because nobody ever knew what went inside that little head of hers. And then there was Jenna, known as the one. The one everybody went to for advice, anything you could think of Jenna was always the one to go to.

Jenna.. 25

Yasmeen.. 23

Dalia.. 21

Sure they had their mini fights and feuds but at the end of the day they were so close that not even an earthquake could tear them apart. Those three were the best of friends. Many envied how close they were, given that these days many sisters fight each other rather than fight along side one another.

This family has had lots of ups and downs and managed to still pull through with each hand holding onto another.

Everything seems perfect right?

But soon they'll all realize that nothing is every really perfect.

And some may already have that fact written down.

So what do you guys think? I'm gonna need alot of help on this one guys. Full on support to keep assuring me that I'm at my best. Aham shay y3jbkm. I've thought really hard on this story and have it all planned out so gt ready.
And in order for me to post the next one, I'm gonna need atleast 10 comments :$
And please from now on without me asking, comment :(
Even if your a silent reader, atleast just give me a thumbs up.
I love you all !

Ok So I've Made A Decision..

2010-09-03T18:57:00.000-07:00

From now on what's past has PAST! I can't change a thing nor will I regret a thing. Why should I? I mean it's like I pitty my life. And I don't. El7mdelah I have family and friends who love me. What more could a girl want? A guy? Well when the time comes, na9eebi will come. Eli rabi katbah by9eer. So whatever happend before writing this post will remain there. Life really is too short. And I'm done waisting time sad and crying.

New life. New me. New everything!

I'm also gonna end my story and start a new one. Please try to understand. I have something better in store for you. And I know your gonna love it.

Just give me a day or two to sort out the story and Inshallah the first post will be posted soon.

I love you all oo asfa lw ana mga9ra ma3km.

I'm 100000000% OFFICIALY BACK !!!! ;**

Where's That Girl ?

2010-08-23T14:14:00.000-07:00

Adri mga9ra m3km.. adri.. and I'm sorry. Something has happend recently and.. well.. I kinda lost myself. So once i find that girl again.. I'll be back. But I promise I wont stop blogging. I love it and writing is a passion of mine. I cant imagine my life without writing.

Just now I wrote this.. and well I wanted to share it with you all..

She was once a free spirit
The girl with the widest smile
The girl they adored
But where is she now ?

She's all alone in that dark room
Afraid to come out
Afraid to face the world again
Afraid to trust in love again

Each second of every day she breaks down
She cries her self to sleep
And sometimes she doesnt know why

She lives in misery and hearache now
Hoping it would end
Praying she could be that girl
The girl with the widest smile again

She wears a mask everyday
To hide the pain inside
Not wanting anyone to know
Because they'll never understand
Saying its "just a phase"

But it's not...
It's as real as the blood in her veins

This is what her life has turned into

PURE darkness

She's terrified of everything around her
Including herself

She keeps it all inside
Hiding away in that dark room

Hallah Bl 7lweeeeeeeeeen !!! ;**

2010-08-15T23:20:00.001-07:00

Sorry I haven't posted in 2 days ;O
Bs you know it's rama'6an oo I'm always busy during this time.
You don't know how much I'd kill to write a post write now!! Bs it needs my full concentration and effort.
Inshallah b7awl aktblkm post bkrah BS lw ma gdrt wa3aaaaaad b3d bkrah ! deal ??? ;p

Kaif el 9yam m3km? 3asa my emta3bkm ?
Ana el7mdelah la2ani a9oon ethneen oo 5amees, ma 9arat t-thaygnii ashwa !!!

Now its like 9 am and im not sleepy -_- and its so annoying cause everybody I know is asleep and I'm all alone !!

Hmmmmm let's see what shall I ramble on about ?

...........
.......................
..................................
.............................................

OH !!!!

My birthday is coming up in 9 days ;D
and aghhh im super excitied !!
I can't wait !!

You know when you have alot to say but nothing seems to walk on your tongue ?
-___________________-

Ok I guess this is probably a sign for me to go to sleep huh ?
Yeah I think I'm gonna try that approach hehe..

I love you all my pretties !!
Bs mmkn a6lb mnkm 6alab ...
aby more comments from silent readers plzzzzz !!!

Goodnight or ummmm.. goodmorning? Oh whatever yallah both ;p

Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah !!! ;**

What Fate Holds For Me 18

2010-08-11T14:28:00.000-07:00

Kl 3am w entom b5air my pretties !!!!!!!!!!!

Wow I cant believe how fast this year has gone by..

A7la shay 3ndi rama'6an wallah.. me and my whole family get together and well it's amazing!! :D

Also my B-day is coming up on the 25th of this month so I'm really siked about that !!

Sorry I didn't post the past two days.. ensha'3alt shway..

So here's a JUICY post for you all.. I LOVE YOU !!!! ;**

___________________________________________________

FORGET WHAT ?!

Fahad lives in London...

Did you guys plan on being on the same plane or something ?

No ofcourse not! Were over.. I haven't spoken to him since I ended things.

I cannot believe we have to spend 7 hours on a plane with that jackass!

Hey it's not all that bad. I mean why let him ruin this for us.. He's probably not in first class anyways..

Oh yeah? Well then why is he sitting 2 rows behind us ?

Farah relax ok. I'm stresed out about this even more than you are ok !

Fahad and I exchanged glances but that was about it. It was a dead straight stare that lasted a second. He walked straight passed us like we were compltete strangers. I have to say I was relieved and disapointed at the same time. I mean a hello would have been nice. Or maybe I'm just being emotional right now. Me and him are over, I shouldnt even think twice about him.

The flight was peachful I must say. Fahad and I didn't cross paths once. Farah and I chatted and watched movies. It was a really good flight. See, thats the thing I love about flying. You get to talk and get closer to the person your with. And Farah and I definitley bonded in those 7 hours.

Once we landed we had a driver waiting for us at the gate.

We gathered our luggage and made our way out to the car.

But before I could even step foot in the car, I felt someone pulling me back.

I have to go..

Please, this will only take a second..

I'm sorry were we not on the same flight'? Seven hours, and now you choose to speak to me ?

I know, I was cold. But you were too.

I have a right to be !!!!

Listen I don't wanna keep you long, but can I call you? We'll go have lunch or something. I just wanna talk to you.

Yeah well it's a little too late for that. Goodbye Bader.

Hey you ok ?

Let's just go.

We finally arrived to our apartment after a half an hour drive. We were exhausted!

It was already 2 am.

Deciding to unpack the next day, we eneded the night.

The next morning we woke up bright and early to start unpacking. After that we went on down to Marks and Spencer and did a little grocery shopping. Our fridge was nothing but empty!! Well there was a little bottle of ketchup but that doesn't really count.. heheheheheh...

Later we dropped off the bags at the apartment and went to lunch. There was this cute little italian restaraunt right across the street from Harrods. I've been dying to take Farah there. I've been there over a hundred times! I love it there. It's so cozy, plus I know the entire staff. So theres no problem with me going alone at times. They always keep me company.

I love it !

Haha told you. Oh don't look now but I think that guy behind you is checking you out.

Or maybe he's checking you out.

Nah I'd know.

Well what should I do ?

Haha you haven't even seen him !

Hey! you wouldn't have mentioned it if he wasn't good looking.

Ok well Í'm gonna head on down to the ladies room.

You know I love you right ?

Who doesn't ? *wink*

The guy behind Farah was absolutley gorgeous !!!! He was tanned. Wearing dark blue jeans. A black v neck t-shirt and A white ralph lauren sweater. He was simply to die for! I have to admit I was a bit jelouse hehe..

The minute I got up he rose to make his way over to Farah. I gave him a smile and walked off.

Excuse me ?

Yes?

Mind if I sit down ?

Uhh no not at all. Please.

Sorry for intruding on your lunch with your friend. But I saw you guys when you walked in.

Oh? Well I'm Farah.

A7mad..

Nice to meet you..

So are you guys on vacation ?

No actually my friend is in her last year in uni and I'm staying with her for the rest of the year.

Oh so you already graduated?

Yeah, I'm a year older than her.

I see.. well I've been living her for the past 2 years. I just wanted to get away from the middle east for a bit.

I know what you mean.. change is always good.

Here come's your friend.. I should probably leave you two..

Oh.. ok.. well it was really nice meeting you...

Hey so what did I miss ?

You missed nothing. But I just missed the chance of getting his number.

Ouch! What happend ?

YOU HAPPEND !!

I'm sorry sweetie..

But you see Farah was in luck. Just as we were about to the step foot out the door A7mad rushed after Farah. He asked for her number wanting to see her again. 7beebty she was so happy. I could see it in her eyes. She felt something with this guy. I was happy for her. If not me, then her.

Later that night after our shopping in Sloane Street we were exhausted. We ordered Chinese take out and watched a couple of silly old chick flicks. We always liked commenting and making fun of the dumb blondes.

During the movie I get a knock the door. It was the door man saying someone had left something for me.

It was a red bag with.. need I say more?

The name Cartier plastered on it.

I pulled out the >>TWO<<>

Hey what you got there ?

Someone just left this for me ..

Cartier.. wow.. someone must really like you...

I can only think of one person who would send me such a gift..

Fahad? You don't think he would .. I mean .. no way..

You obviously don't know Fahad..

Well open it..

I opened the first box and inside was the 3 ring Trinity necklace. It was absolutely gorgeous!

I then opened the second box and this time my jaw dropped wide open!

Oh.. my... god !!! OH MY GOD !!!! It's gorgeous !!!

Damn.. I guess he really does love you..

We were both in total shock!

How could Fahad do something like this.. Two gifts !!!

There was a card as well...

I bet your screaming your head off right now aren't you ?

3leeki bl 3afya Hadeel 7beebty..

I couldn't give you just one gift.. You deserve a whole lot more..

And you know that if I could give the world, I would.

I thought one casual necklace you could wear anytime and one special one.

I knew the diamond necklace would suit you perfectly.

You deserve the absolute best Hadeel, I'm sorry for what I put you through..

I just hope you can somehow find it in your heart to forgive me..

And this isn't me bribing you, don't let Farah get into your head.

I was just walking past the store and thought of you..

I love you Hadeel Al-X..

My eyes started to water.

A smile suddenly appeared on my face.

Farah knew what my next move was.

She handed me my cell phone.

Go for it..

What Fate Holds For Me 17

2010-08-07T07:44:00.000-07:00

I know its short ;/
But I promise a longer one tommorow!
I love you all my PRETTIES !! ;**

Why would Fahad threaten Bader to stay away from me? I mean I could ask him right? But then he'd make a huge deal out of it. Saying that I was taking Bader's side and all that load of crap. But either way I had to confront him, he had to know that I went to see Bader and what he told me.

I was just trying to protect you.

I don't need protecting! You told me that you trusted me and that you would leave it alone! Now I hear that you threatend Bader!

He bothers me. Don't I have the right ---

No! You have no right what so ever! This is my life and he is my friend!

So when's the part where I swoop in with an apology ?

You know what.... were done! I can't be with someone who is so self centered that he cant even think about anybody other than himself!!

Why dont you go rest and we'll talk first thing in the morning.

I'm not a puppet on a string Fahad. You cant controle me whenever you want !!!!!!!!!!!!

I had no other choice. He wasn't taking me or the matter seriously. How can I be with someone like that? Sultan was right. This guy wasn't good enough for me.

Just two more weeks to go, then I'm back in London for my last year.

I'm not gonna judge. If this is what you really want then I support you, even if you choose to take Fahad back.

Thank's 7beebty. But I think I'm gonna stay away fromt he dating world for a bit..

Hey umm I just have a question... Did you love him ?

............. Yeah.... I did..... But he never said it me.. and it would have been so awkward if I had said it first.....

Sweetie I'm so sorry... I... wow I just wanna kill him right now.

Would it be so terrible if I said that I wanted him next to me right now ?

No sweetie it wouldn't. You loved him and he hurt you. It's only natural. But it'll take time and I'll be here with you whenever you need me.

Can I ask you for a favor ?

Sure anything.

Come stay with me in London.

Hahahaha I think that's more of a demand .

I just need my best friend. And those last 3 years spent without you killed me!

Say no more.

Farah went and spoke with her parents and thank God they agreed. She's a year older than me and had already gradyated last year from university so there was nothing really much keeping her here.

Just 2 more weeks and I'll be gone from here. I couldn't wait. There was just so much drama going on, and I needed to get away from it all.

2 WEEKS LATER ...

We were finaly leaving. I was excited, yet at the same time scared. Excited because I get to leave all the drama behind. And scared cause I was leaving Bader behind. I still didn't get the chance to restore our friendship. He was such a sweet and geniuine guy, and I just let him slip away.

Alot was going on the past 2 weeks that I didn't have the courage to face him again. I would constantly give myself excuses to talk to him the next day. But now I have a permanent excuse, I was leaving for a year. I even tried calling him on our way to the airport but it would go straight to voicemail. I knew he was busy with his sister and all but I was still so worried about him. He's been through so much... I kinda feel like some of it was my fault.

You know you live in your thoughts more than you do in reality?

Thanks, I didn't know that.

C'mon were gonna be in London tomorrow. You'll start uni in a couple days... oh wait hey what am I gonna do ?

Haha we'll figuire something out don't worry. Oh hey what about you and Haitham?

You need me now. He'll just have to wait.

Babe I'm so sorry.. But you liked him so much.

I know, but their are still plenty other fish in the sea.

Are you guys like still gonna keep in touch ?

What's the point? Whatever I can forget him.......... OH and I think I just did!!! Damnnnn look at that hottie !!!

Hahahahahahah oh my god are you serious? That's just the back of his head!

Uh yeah! A very cute back of a head. I mean look at him. Low waist jeans. White t-shirt. Grey sweater. Aghh such a hot look.. Ok now turn around... turn around... c'mon... turn ---

Ok will you please stop, your annoying me.

Shhh!!! .... turn around.. turn around tu--- Oh no please turn back around...

Oh yeah.. I forgot.....

This Post Is For Anonymous

2010-08-06T16:13:00.000-07:00

No problem at all.

Well as mentioned in the story, Hadeel's parents are "early birds". They go to bed early. Which is why Farah was the one who went down and opened the door for Fahad. This is all just part of the story.

I'm sorry if it somehow offended you in some way ?

And as for me, well nothing like that ever goes on with me. No man has ever been snucked into my house or will ever be for that matter. I'm not trying to sound rude. Bs it's just not me. Some girls may be ok with the idea, and I'm not judging them. Some are cool with it, and some are simply not. Just because I added this scene to my story, doesnt mean I have ever done it.

So I hope that answers your question. And again I'm sorry if that little scene offended you.

- Oh and my PRETTIES, I wrote the post but the computer shut down due to low batterý and since I was typing on and on non stop, it didn't get a chance to automaticaly save like it always does. But I remember everything so no worries. Inshallah by tommorow afternoon it'll be posted. I just really had to get back to this question I've been asked.

I love you all ! ;**

What Fate Holds For Me 16 B.

2010-08-05T12:24:00.000-07:00

MY PRETTIES!!
Sorry I couldn't post yesterday. R7t m3 my grandmother saweenah 3mrah.. :)
I just love the feeling you get after you've done it. I dont know how to describe it, but its one amazing feeling.. :)
So here is part B .. I love you all ;**

OH!! And 7awoor, N, and Doona , WALAW !! Im only speaking the truth 7abaybe.. I love each and every one of you. This post is dedicated to you !! Muuuuuuwah !!

___________________________________

What was that all about ?

What are you talking about ?

You and Farah, seemed like something was going on over there ...

7beebty your tired. Your just being a bit delusional. Try to relax.

DELUSIONAL ?!

I didn't mean it that way.. I just meant your tired and all.. so your just ---

Being delusional ?

7beebty I'm sorry ..

Whatever, just start the movie.

7ather..

Something wasn't right. And I know I wasn't being delusional. How dare he say that!! But I wasn't going to worry about it now. I already have too much on my plate. I missed out on the clinic today and that's really bombing me out. Bader isn't speaking to me which is really starting to irritate me. And on top of it all I feel like my head is gonna explode and that my throat is cutting in so deep!

That night Fahad and I didn't talk much. I fell asleep in the middle of the movie.

So the next day I was feeling surprisingly alot better so I decided to head back into the clinic. But the thing was Bader wasn't there. And his sister was checked out. Is she ok ? Is he ok ?

I tried dialing his number multiple times but it would go straight to voicemail. I was starting to get alot worried. I just had to be patient. After all, there wasn't much I could do.

Later that evening I met up with Farah at a nice cozy little restaurant. We both deserved the night out, just as girls. We caught up and I asked her about what happened with Fahad the other night. She just told me that they were goofing off. Hmmm...

While we were munching down on our dessert, a familiar face spotted us and came over

Oh.. hey.. Haitham..

Halah Farah.. How are you ?

Couldn't be better..

Listen I've been meaning to call you but I've just been busy these past few weeks..

Exactly weeks. Listen if your not that interested in me just say it. I'm a big girl I can handle the truth. It's not like your the only guy in this city. You know what it's your loss anyways not mine. Oh and trust me buddy you are missing out!! Yup ya' herd me right. Your ---

Sweetie.. no.. stop ...

No it's ok. Let her go on.

You can rot in hell for all I care!!

Wow.. may I speak now ?

Whatever ..

I was at my uncles chalet. He'd gotten really sick and the whole family was there.

Oh...

Yeah oh.. So when you turn back into the adorable sweet girl I met at the beach, gimme a call. Goodbye ladies.

I just blew it didn't I ?

I wouldn't say blew it ...

Hadeel..

Oh honey you blew it big time !!

A few days later while I was at the clinic I asked about Bader and his sister, where they lived. No doubt they would have that type of information. And since I had a card that allowed me full access, I used it to enter the file room. I found his sisters file and wrote down their address. I guess you all know where I was headed next.

I was little nervous at first to just show up unexpected. But he had it coming for not returning any of my texts or calls.

How the hell did you find me ?

Wow.. you have an amazing house mashallah...

Hadeel..

I looked at your sisters file..

She snoops too..

Well do you blame me !!!

Shhhhhhhh!!! She's resting!!!

Oh thank god so she's ok !!!

Elmd7la rabi satr 3leeha.. she just needs some peace and quite for a while..

Where are your parent's ?

They went out to get a couple of things for my sister.

Awhh that's nice.

Is there a reason to why your here ?

I wanna know why your treating me this way.

I'm just following orders.

What orders? What are you talking about?

Your man asked me to stay away from you..

You guys barely spoke when you met !

He came in to shake my hand remember? And when he did, he told me to back the hell off.

I don't understand...

What's there not to understand? He wants me out of your life. Simple.

You could have just came and told me this.

Do you see me needing any more problems to handle in my life right now ?

I'm sorry Bader.

Listen I need to be getting up to my sister now. So when you've dealt with all of this, lemme know. Otherwise please don't contact me. I've got enough on my plate right now.

_____________________________________________

Please comment.. ;(

7awoor, N:* , Love, Comatose, Doona ..

2010-08-03T14:29:00.000-07:00

I wanna dedicate this post to you!

I know I haven't been there to comment as always and I apologize. But from now on inshallah I will.

So here it goes...

7awoor ..

No words!! Honestly no words!! I don't know what to say. With each post you write, you amaze me more and more. I'm hooked on your stories and am following them like CRAZY!! I love you and what you bring into the blog sphere. Your one hell of a writer and I'm damn proud to be a follower. Faman el jar7 really captured my heart and I'm so sad its coming to an end, but at the same time excited cause I know you have more and better stories yet to come. And the blog you just started in which all bloggers would get together and share their ideas.. well let me just say BRAVO! It was such a sweet thing you did and I for one fully appreciate it. Oo inshallah starting from now I will participate in those discussions. But I have to warn you, I do tend to babble on alot so beware. Hehehehhe !! Oh and the interview you recently posted was the sweetest most cutest thing!!! Y7lelkm.. Allah y5alekm el ba3ath inshallah. I'm so proud of you really I am. You have come a long way. I'm super excited for you to be started work as doctor. Allah ywafgk 7beebty oo yktblek kl el 5air. I love you so much !! ;********

____________________________________________

N:* ..

First of all I must say purple roses are my favorite too :$
Your story also captured my heart. I'm obsessed with it. And I'm impressed and loving your style of writing. I'm proud to also be a follower to such a talented writer :)
Your story deals with the truth about life. That not everything comes easy and that to get to your bliss.. you have to go through fire first. That's what I love so much about your story. And it tells me alot about you personality as well. I may not know you as well as I know some of the bloggers here bs 3ala6ool da5alti galbi. And Please don't stop writing. Haha funny as it may sound, I want this story to be over.. I'm just dying to know what you have in store for us next hehehe.. I love you ;**

___________________________________________

Love ..

Do you know how much I miss you ?!?!?! :(
Your stories, I'm craving for them.. You wrote about everything !!! Many of your stories always turn my brain on. It was you who inspired me to start my very own blog!! <3
I know you must be going through alot right now and I don't wanna pressure you but please come back soon.. get well and come back soon. Aham shay you take care of yourself. I'm loving your new story and cant wait to read the rest. Its different. Not like your other stories. I'm anxious for you to come back and I'll be waiting. Love you! ;**

______________________________________________

Comatose ..

3 words!! You are me !! Haha !! ;p
Wallah it's like when you write, a7s enah ana eb maknik..
I love your posts and the topics you choose to write about.
Although I love reading stories, this also caught my eye.
I was just passing through blogs when I came across your and just after reading the first post I immediately became a follower.
Keep up exactly what your doing.. do not change a thing! Everything is perfect just the way it is.
I love you ;**

____________________________________________

Doona ..

You free write which is what I love about you. Whatever comes to your mind, bad or good. You just open up your blog and write about it. I've noticed that your not afraid to express and write about whatever the hell it is you want. I may not be commented alot but neither have you ;p haha la wallah I'm joking. I will from now on inshallah. Please post more often. I miss your posts..
I love you ;**

____________________________________________

Many of my other bloggers I adore you all just as much.. la tz3aloon meni please ;******

What Fate Holds For Me 16 A.

2010-07-16T07:35:00.000-07:00

Whew!! I'm finaly back home!! :D
I know I promised a post on Monday bs knt 9yma fa I didn't really have the energy to write. So here is part A, and inshallah aw3adkm part B tomorrow inshallah.
Like I said Suzy is back for good :)
I love you all and missed you so much AND I hope you guys are having an awesome summer. ;** ((oo wain my comments :( aby my comments back :( I miss my comments :( Lazim tshaj3ooni and your comments always to do that.. you guys make me wanna go on writing and never quit))

Oh and just before I start the post off, I wanna dedicate a few words to someone very dear to me.. I just hope that person is reading this right now..

You don't know what you got, till your missing it allot
I had to go throw it away
I was wrong from the start, from the bottom of my heart I apologize
What I did to you was hurtful
What I'm going through is hurtful

I used to bide my time
I used to beat around the bush
I'd rather give my ego another push
I used to be a fool
It was a foolish game I played
And it's a fools fate counting mistakes I've made
Once I had it right it was all too late

... I was wrong from the start, from the bottom of my heart I apologize
What I did to you was hurtful
What I'm going through is hurtful

________________________________________________

I started helping out more and more at the center. I would see Bader there sometimes and he'd come over and say hello, but that was it. After we went out for lunch that day, he kind of started to distant himself away from me. I didn't know why. Was it something I did ?

Meanwhile Farah and I were back to normal. We decided to forget about what happened and move past it. Also by the looks of it, She and Fahad seemed to be getting along better. I was so glad that they were willing to put their differences aside for me.

One morning while I was walking towards the entrance of the clinic I saw Bader walking out. He saw me but didnt even bother to say a word. He just walked right passed me like I wasn't even there. I've had it with him!! I needed to know what the hell was wrong with him!! What the hell did I do?

Oh so is this how it's gonna be from now on ?

Excuse me ?

Did I do something to offend you ? No, really tell me. What could I have possibly done to make you act like such an ass whole ?!

It's not you...

Well then...

Why don't you ask Fahad... I gotta go.

Huh?... Wait what does he have to do with this ?

Fahad picked me up from work later that evening and I decided to tell him about what happened earlier today with Bader.

Aha.. well nothing comes to mind really. He's obviously just trying to point blame on somebody close to you.

I dunno.. this isn't him. Are you sure you haven't said anything? Maybe you said something that bothered him.

The guy and I haven't even sat down to a cup of coffee for me to even say something.

I'm just really worried about him that's all...

So you don't believe me ?

Of course I believe you.. but it just makes no sense at all why he would ask me to ask you. How could you have a roll in any of this.

Exactly! That guy is delusional!

The next day I called in sick. I woke up to this high fever. I felt so cold and shivers would run all over my body. I had no idea where all of this came from. My mom called in a doctor and he said that it was just a normal fever. All I needed was a bit of bed rest and some medication and I'd be fine. Luckily it wasn't anything serious. I'm the type of person that always rushes to conclusions when it comes to these things.

On that night Farah and I were supposed to spend the evening together, but due to be coming down with a fever she decided to bring over take out and we would pop in some DVDs.

So Fahad has no idea to what Bader was talking about ?

Nope. Nothing.

Hmmm... well why don't you try asking Bader what he meant. And then go back and talk to Fahad about it and see his reaction. I bet you'll easily know whether he's lying or telling the truth. Its all about confrontation.

Hahaha where do you get all of this ?

Let's see.... I have no boyfriend, therefore I have no life.

Aha.. and I can see by that wide smile on your face how proud you are of that.

Oh yeah yeah.. so proud that the self centred bastard HAITHAM didn't return ANY of my damn phone calls!!!

MMMM... here's a thought, why don't you try calling him again ?

Oh yeah and be the needy desperate girl ?? No thank you !!

Ok are you here to make me feel better or are you here to vent about your STILL NOT DEVELOPED relationship with Haitham ?

While we were discussing Farah's little dilemma, I got a text from Fahad saying that he was outside my house wanting to get it.

I asked Farah to go downstairs and unlock the door to let him in. She refused at first but once I put on my sad puppy dog look, she had no choice but to give in.

My parents were early birds so they sleep at around 11. I would always be the only one awake in the entire house.

Ya ba3ad 3umri ta3bana..

Ee shayef 7beebi..

Ok eww.. ama go.

Faroo7 yallah 3ad please stay. The 3 of us can watch a movie.

As lovely as that sounds I think I'm gonna pass.

How about I walk you out ?

Oh no you don't have to really. It was a pleasure just walking up the stairs with you.

Oh before I forget Farah...

What?

Have you ever fallen down a flight of stairs ?

Uhh.. no why ?

Just asking. But trust me it kills...

Inshallah part B tommorow. Have a good night my pretties.. I love each and every one of you so so much and I missed like hell !! Muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuwaaaaaaaah !! ;**

What Fate Holds For Me 15

2010-06-20T03:17:00.000-07:00

7abaybee wallah asfa 6awalt 3leekm. Bs Ive been a bit busy tha past two days. My best friend and I broke up. LOL i dont know what else to call it. She wasnt the person I thought she was. And turns out she does things that Im totaly against. Sure she was there for me and all that bs wsh aham, friendship wla sm3aty? Anyways I'll soon be entering the wonderful life of uni so Im gonna meet a bunch of girls better than her. Anyways Im back oon shallah ra7 a7awel I post kl yoom. Bs if I dont 3therooni. I love you all. And sorry I know I keep bringing this up. bs ba7ad is commenting oo its the only thing gives me support and motivation :(

I said goodbye to Fahad and told him we;d do something later that night.

Bader and I were out to Lunch at a nearby restuarant.

Umm.. so he seems nice.

Who? Oh you mean Fahad. Yeah he is.

Is that why you wouldnt go out with me ?

Fahad and I werent really a couple back when I first met you.

Ok so then it was me? Did I give you some sort of bad vibe ?

I dunno I just didnt feel a spark. I mean theres supposed to be that spark. And I definitley felt it with Fahad.

But we can still be friends yeah ?

Umm.. well I guess so but with limits.

Ofcourse.

We got back to the center and went our seperate ways.

I had forgotton my phone in my office, oh yeah they gave me such a cute little office.

Fahad had left me 2 missed calls and 1 text.

7beebty I dont want you ever seeing that man again. Call me..

I was a bit confused. He seemed fine earlier when he said hello to Bader. From where I was standing they got along fine. He doesnt even know Bader so how can he be so quick to judge. I just hope he's not the over jelouse type. Sure a girls loves it when her man is jelouse of her, but too much is just too much. I had to let Fahad know his limits before he lget the idea that he can stomp all over me whenever he wants. In a relationship everything has to be cleared up from the begining or else problems will occur later on. ** speaking out of experiance :) **

Later that night I told Fahad everything that was on my mind.

But you know Im doing this cause I care about you.

I know 7ayati wallah I know bs there has to be limits. Theres a red line that neither one of us can cross. And that line is called trust. Do you trust me ?

Ofcourse I do.

Well then thats all there is to it. You have your friends and I have mine. They cannot mix.

Your right and Im sorry.

Wow just like that ?

If this will make you happy then yeah.

Good we got that sorted out.

Speaking of friends, anything new with Farah ?

Nope. Haven't herd from her in a while now. I guess she finaly gave up.

Later that night when I walked into my room, I found one hell of big surprise.

Sultan and Farah were sitting on my bed.

They both looked so down.

At first I thought they were together. But then I remembered Haitham so I let that thought slip away.

I wa shocked. I mean if one of them, either or were here it would make perfect sense. But both of them ? Oh I could not wait to find out.

Hallah Hadeel..

What are you guys doing here. Especially you!

First of all dont talk to her that way and second sit down. We need to talk.

Ooooo what are you guys breaking up with me now ?

This isnt funny. SIT DOWN !

Fine! There Im sitting. What ?

Do you realize that this is your best friend sitting infront of you right now? Do you realize that you just let her go.

No, she let ME slip away. She was cruel and selfish!

I was trying to protect you !! He isnt right for you !!

That isnt your call to make !

Hadeel you know me. You know that I want nothing but the best for you. Farah may have dine it the wrong way but she lives you so much. You cant just throw all those years of friendship away for a guy you just met!

I need my best friend to be supportive of the man in my life. She has to ! What If I need her? Who will I go to? Im not gonna leave Fahad if thats what your both here for.

I never meant to hurt you. You mean so much to me. But its just that I didnt get a good vibe from me. I dunno theres just something wrong about him.

You dont even know him! You've never even see or spoke to him.

Yarabiii.. does he make you happy ?

Yes.

Do you have any doubts at all ?

No.

Well then Im happy for you.. Well atleast I'll do my very best to get ussed to it all.

Take as much time as you need, but I just really need my best friend by my side.

Im always by your side 7beebty.

Okaaaaaaaaaay this is getting a bit too girly for me. My job here is done. Goodbye ladies.

I walked Sultan to the door. I asked him why he suddenly cared about my relationship with Fahad. I thought he started to care. But turns out that Farah came to him and asked for his help. I guess this was all just an act of kindness. Not for me, but for Farah. I actualy thought he was coming around but he told he did this because friendship is more important than any guy. But what really gto to me was when he told me that Fahad may be trying to get rid of everyone in my life so that I would be close to just him. As always I defended Fahad, and Sultan walked away with a disappointment.

Since Farah wasnt really cozying up to the idea of Fahad and me. I told her to come to lunch with us the next day. To give him a second chance. Thank God she agreed!

The Next Day At Lunch..

Everything was going fine until I got up to use the restroom. They had an... intresting talk.

Listen Im sorry about what I did.

I understand.. your jelouse.

Hahahaha excuse me?

Its ok. I understand. Your alone and your jelouse that your best friend has found someone.

Ok I think you've got the wrong script over there. I was just trying to protect my best friend. I would go to the extreme to do that.

Farah Farah.. sweet innocent Farah. I really do like Hadeel and Im not going anywhere. So you better get used to that.

Well what the hell do you think Im doing here then ?

Mmm..

Ok sweetie listen here. Frankly I dont like you. I just dont. So lets just pretend that we both get along for Hadeel's sake. But I swear if you hurt her I will kill you. I will hunt you down and kick your ass. And no this is not me speaking out of anger, this is me speaking out of truth.

Well arnt you fiesty.

Your a pig!

Hey.. so what are we talking about?

Oh nothing 7beebty. Farah was just telling me how much she hates horror movies. Especialy the scene where the girls makes a wrong move and ends up hurt.

Awww Im so glad you guys are getting along.

Me too.. Me too..

What Fate Holds For Me 14

2010-06-15T12:17:00.000-07:00

I spent the rest of the day with my parents. They took me out to dinner to celebrate. All in all it was a great dinner despita what has happend.

The next morning I woke up with a big smile on my face. I was so excited, I couldnt wait to start my first day at the center. So I washed up and got dressed. I wanted to be casual so I wore my skinny jeans, a sleevless white v neck top, and a red cardigan. And to finish it off, some gold short gladiator sandals. I then headed down for breakfast. My mom and dad were still asleep so I made my own breakfast.

I was finaly ready to leave, Fahad was just outside waiting to drop me off.

Were here.. so you ready ?

Yeah but a little scared. I mean what if I get scared, cry or breakdown. I mean I care so much about these kids.

Umm isn't that the guy from yesterday ?

Oh my god.. yeah....... BADER !

What are you doing.. ta3ali let me walk you in.

La its ok 7beebi..

I rushed over to Bader who didnt look too thrilled to see me.

Hey how are you ?

Fine..

Then he just breezed right passed me. He didn't even look at me, just stared at the ground.

Im fine thanks for asking.

Hadeel Im really not in the mood. Tawni 9a7i o mani rayeg. Fa lw tbeeni a9ar5 3leek 7ayak allah ma3ay. Otherwise leave me the hell alone.

This was a side of him Ive never seen before. He's always the sweet innocent guy.

Anyways it was my first day and I wasnt gonna let him or anybody ruin it for me.

So I walked in with my head up high and greeted everybody. I took my card which allowed me free acess anywhere in the building and went to find my boss.

She was in the playroom with some of the children.

Hallah Hadeel.. welcome to the team.

Thank you so much for having me Im so excited.

Well I really felt yesterday that you care about these children. But I want you to keep in mind that were here to try and make them happy. These kids are all under 5, with some disabilities. So please dont let us down.

I wont, you have my word.

Great, now do you have any questions you would like to ask me before you begin ?

Yes actualy.. umm that man over there sitting down. Who's he waiting for ?

Oh he comes here alot, mostly during the mornings. He has a four year old sister.

Oh.. well what's wrong with her? Does she have a disablity ?

No.. umm... well upstairs on the 3rd floor we have a small clinic. And sometimes we have patients who stay there. And well his sister has been in a coma for the past two months.

Oh my god there terrible. But is she safe I mean are your staff here perfectly qualified to take care of her ?

Haha ofcourse they are! We have nothing but the best!

Im sorry I asked but..

Its alright now lets get back to work.

I walked around here and there and started playing with the children. I even gathered a few of them around and began to read to them. It felt so good to finaly do something for others. I've been busy with myself and my studies not having time for anthing or anyone else. Out of everything I could have done this summer, Im so glad I chose this. It was for a good cause.

I tried looking for Bader but couldnt find him anywhere. Since I had free acess to anywhere in the building I decided to go up to the clinic to find him.

Lucky for me he was there. In a glass room sitting on the bedside next to his sister. Just looking at her she broke my heart. She looked so weak and helpless. I couldnt help but want to go and hug her. I felt fo Bader, althought I didnt have any siblings I could imagine myself in his situation. I was surprised at how content he was whenever I saw him. He seemed like such a normal guy with no problems attatched to him.

Im sorry..

What are you doing here ?

I asked about you downstairs and they told me about your sister.. Bader Im so so sorry.

Why did you have to go and dig your nose in where it didnt belong..

Im sorry.. I'll leave...

No.. Hadeel wait.. come in.

So what happend to her ?

It was me.. I did this to her.

What do you mean you did this to her ?

We were on our way home from a movie one night and I ran a red light. I saw no cars coming my way so I ran it. I guess I was wrong and the car crashed on her side of the car.

Oh my god.. Bader Im so sorry...

I got off my seat and went over to him and hugged him. I started to tear up but pulled myself together. I really did feel sorry for him. I wished I could do something to make him feel a bit better.

Hey you know what? How about you get a change of scenary.

But please a place nearby..

Ofcourse dont worry. I have a break and the perfect place.

On our way out walking to his car somebody suddenly pulls me back by my arm.

And where do you think your going ?

Hallah 7beeby this is Bader. He's not feeling too well so Im taking him out for lunch.

Aha.. well how about I come with you guys ?

7beebi I dont think thats a good idea. Him opening up to somone else..

Well atleast let me say hello.

I was surprised tha Fahad wanted to say hello, and even more surprised when he gave him a friendly hug. Well.. atleast it seemed friendly.

Dont even think about making a move on her...

What Fate Holds For Me 13

2010-06-15T07:38:00.000-07:00

Adrii its short bs inshallah by midnight tonight I will post part 14. Met7amsa marra min hathal post o wdii akamla bsr3aaaa heheheheheh :D

I love you all..

Oh and 7awoor 7beebty la ytheeg 9adrik.. whoever is doing this is a cheao talent. Your much better than girl. O bs goli el7mdela wl shkr. Your a talented writer mashallah 3leeki oo you should be proud of yourself and just move on. We all love you and know that ! Dont let this get to you. This person is obviously jelouse of your skills.. so if I were you I'd just smile with my head up high ;p.. keep doing what your doing and know were all following you every step of the way..

Amoot feeeek 7beebty !! ;***

I called Fahad and he told me to just tell him where I am and he'd be there soon.

7beebty shfeek 5ara3teeni ?!

Just take me back home please, I wanna go back home.

7ather bs awal shay goleli wsh eli 9ar !

I told him everything. Staring from where Farah wasnt too thrilled about me having him in my life and ending it with me finding the flowers and card in her bedroom drawer.

Fahad's face began to turn red. Due to what Ive witnessed in the past, he's the type that would get upset really fast.

He dropped me off home and told me to not worry about a thing.

But all I could do was worry. This was supposed to be our summer, me and Farah. And now I dont think I can have that.

The next afternoon I sat down in the living room with my mom and I aksed her if she knew any children centers intrested in a volunteer. Mama has a friend who works at one so she gave her a call and got me an interview.

I was a little upset that I had to go through an interview but as long as I had a shot..

See, I've always loved kids. I especialy for a while now have wanted to help out in a center. It didnt matter to me what center it was, as long as I helped them in any way. That would be more than enough for me.

My interview was set for tommorow at 11 am, I couldnt wait.

Farah tried calling and texting me a couple times but I didnt bother returning any of them. I mean what could she possibly have to say to me? Sorry? That certainly wont do anything. Her actions and reasons for it were perfectly clear. She hated Fahad and didnt want us to be together. But never, NEVER did I think she would snoop this low and do something so shady that was beneath her.

I wanted to get a good nights rest before my interview so Fahad said he would take me out to an early dinner.

Are you excited 7beebty ?

Ehh!!! I cant wait wallah bs its just an interview I mean I dont wanna get my hopes ut too high.

La nshallah you'll do fine 7beebty I know you will. And you never know, they might even give you the job immidiatley.

I hope so..

Fahad really put me at ease that night. I went to bed feeling calm and relaxed. Once I got tucked into my bed we talked on the phone for a few minutes then I went off to sleep.

The next morning I woke up so nervous. I've never actualy been in an interview let alone had a job.

My mom made me an amazing breakfast of pancakes and fruits. She even offered to drive me to the center herself but I lied and told her that Farah would be taking me cause the truth was that Fahad would be picking me up.

Once I got to the center I was panicking. Fahad kissed me on my forehead and told me it was going to be ok. He held me in his arms until they called out my name.

He wished me good luck and said he's be right outside waiting for me.

All they did was ask me one simple question.. "why are you here?"

Honestly Ive always loved kids. Whenever I saw them they always put an instant smile on my face. They really are the miracles of life. And if I have the chance to make a diffrence.. or atleast a one percent diffrence then thats more than enough for me. Seeing them in pain or in siffering really breaks my heart. And If I have the chance to put a smile on their face just like they put a smile on my face then that would mean the absolute world to me. I would really love to work with you at this center. These children need people to take care of them while their parents are not with them. Their disabilities doesnt make then less than who they are, and I want to show them that.

I couldnt believe it. They hired me! They said that I spoke with such passion and confidence that they would love to have me start right away.

I ran into Fahad's arms like a little child and he carried me and twirled me around like a little princess. He was so proud of me, I could see it in his eyes.

He took my hand and we made our way out to the car. On our way walking down the stairs, I see a familiar face walking towards me.

Bader?

Oh... Hadeel.. umm... hi....

What are you doing here ?

Just visiting..

Oh.. who is it ?

Sorry but if you dont mind I have to go.. it was nice seeing you again..

Who was that ?!!!!

Calm down sparky.. he's no one.. just a guy..

Mmm.. anyways so where do you wanna go ?

.....

Hadeel? shfeek tana7ty ?

... huh? Oh mafeeni shay.. ok yallah lets go...

Did that guy get to you or something ? Are you sure your telling me everything ?

La he didnt. Im fine. Lets just go.

What Fate Holds For Me 12

2010-06-12T02:45:00.000-07:00

I slept fine that night. Not perfect but fine. I decided I wouldnt run after a guy that obviously has issues. Im done with him making me feel like total crap. This time Im taking the mean road and wait for him to come to me. The only problem was that it's been 2 days ever since that night. But I tried not to think much about it. Farah and I said we would have fun this summer and we will. We both deserve it.

She was also waiting for a call from Haitham. But he didn't even send her a text. Still she didnt let it get to her. I wish I could be more like her and just take things easy and learn to let loose. My biggest problem was that I think too much which causes me to become negative and mis-judge everything.

One afternoon Farah and I decided to go to the super market. Our kithen was completley empty and were two tiny girls with huge appetites.

We stopped by each aisle spending ages looking at the shelves. Shopping for food was like shopping for clothes to us. It all had to be perfect. We couldnt miss out a single thing.

You think we got it all ?

Yeah I think we pretty much bought the whole market.

Oh you know what I think I forgot some milk, I'll be right back.

Huh? You dont even drink milk. Get your tiny little butt back here!

Well then I'll just get some juice!

Surprise surprise !!

He seems to be turning up everywhere..

Hey there stranger.

Oh you have got to be kidding me!!

Hahaha shfeek ? Slmy.

Hello. Now will you please leave me alone.

I didnt follow you here if thats what you think.

Oh really? Then what do you call it ?

I was here long before you and Farah. She saw me at the fruit counter and came to say hello.

Aint she a dear.. thats lovely and all but I'm busy right now.

Aha.. I see. Well I wouldnt wanna interupt your waiting. Goodbye Hadeel.

As I guilty and bad as I feel for doing that, I had no other choice. He just wouldnt get the messege. It had to end one way or the other. I had to do it this way. Mean is needed to be used at times. Especialy times like these.

But what if he meant what he said? Just being friends?

I dont believe men and women can be friends without sparks flying all around.. but could it really ?

Oh was that Bader I just saw ?

Dont Farah. He told me you came up to him.

What? I just went to say hi.

We both know you did alot more than that. I'll meet you at the car.

Hadeel.. Hadeel ..!!

When we got back to the house we un loaded everything quietly. She tried talking to me but I would just ignore her. Speakig to her would only make me more upset.

After everything was done I went up to my room to take a nap.

Incoming Call: Unknown Number

Hello?

Hallah, Farah ?

HAITHAM !

Haha shfeek ?

Im just excited you called.

Adrii its been long bs I was busy with a few things. But now that Im free I would really love to see you.

I'd really like that.

How about tonight. I know its last minute and all --

PERFECT !

So Farah had her date later that evening and I was still misrable lying on my bed waiting for something, ANYTHING from Fahad.

Is he that cold he doesnt have a heart or a single emotion ?!

Do I mean anything to him? Or were all those words just scripted ?

Farah left for her date with Haitham without even telling me. I herd the door close and a car drive away so it was pretty obviouse she had left.

I was all alone in the house but decided to try and make the best of it.

There was an indoor pool so I decided to take a little swim.

They say it relaxes the mind.

The door to the pool was locked, it would probably be in Farah's room so I rumedged through her drawers to try and find the key.

Though in one of her drawers I found a huge shocker.

It's true what they say, peoples secrets are always hidden in their bedrooms.

But I never thought Farah would hide anything from me.

In a drawer I saw a beautiful bouquet of purple roses, my favorite. and a card. But the roses seemed a bit old.

I pulled out the roses and the card..

I would call or text but I know it wouldnt make a diffrence. I hope this put's a smile on your face. Dooli please find it in your heart to firgive me. I'm sorry. When your ready call me, I'll be waiting for you.

- Fahad

I couldnt believe my eyes.

Was this really from Fahad ?

Was this really hidden in Farah's drawer ?

Did she really keep this from in for 2 days ?

She's supposed to accept what makes me happy but instead she tries push it away.

I dont think I could ever forgive.

Someome who meant alot to me.. 6a7at min 3eeni.

I never expected this, especialy from her.

She broke the trust that was between us and I dont think it can ever be the same.

I waited for her downstairs near the door with my suitcase all packed.

Ma knt aby anzl 3ala mstawaha so I decided to wait till she got back to say goodbye.

Once she walked through the door I threw the roses on her face and stormed out.

She froze staring down at the roses but eventualy caught up with me just before I started the car.

HADEEL WAIT !!

Theres nothing you can say Farah. How could you do this to me. Was it fun for you watching your best friend misrable the past 2 days?

I did it for your own good 7beebty. I was trying to protect you.

NO DONT EVEN ! Ive never been in a relationship! Ive never had someone care so much about me! I wasnt even planning on getting into a relationship and then Fahad comes into my life and turnes my world upside down! Both good and bad! Yes he does make me mad at times but isnt that part of every relationship? Fighting makes us stronger. I could easily leave him if I wanted to. But I didnt! And you know why? Because he's someone worth suffering for. Im sure he has his reasons and in time he will open up to me. I really care about him and so does he! He isnt perfect! Neither am I! Besides I dont want him perfect! Besides I love the way he is! And you know what! I think Im falling in love with him! And so help me God if you do anything to try and take that away from me I will never speak to you for as long as I live on this damn earth!

Hadeel... Im.. sorry.. I never knew you felt that way about him.

Even if I didnt you were supposed to accept him! I dont care if you dont think hes good for me. But I do! Mu ma3natah lw enti mu merta7a tro7een t5arbeen far7at el nas. 3eeb 3leeki! Ma tst7een? Are you that cruel and selfish. Abad ma twaq3t hathal shay mnk!! 67ty min 3eeni eb GOWA !

How could you say all this to me Hadeel ?

Because you deserve every word of it !! 7asbya Allah w n3m alwakeel !!

I called Fahad on my way..

I need to see you.. now..

What Fate Holds For Me 11

2010-06-10T03:07:00.000-07:00

You guys mdri wsh feeni ;s

I was writing the post and everything but then I suddenly stopped and turned off my laptop. I've been through alot these past 2 weeks.

Any ideas how to heal a broken bruised heart ?

I'm not sleeping at all. I'm kinda suffering with insomnia. I'm exhausted. I have this headach that wont go away. Im dizzy all the time. 6ool el wagt mnsad7a 3al sreer.

You guys mdrii wsh asawi.. what do I do ?

I cant take it anymore. I just want it all to stop !

Wallah mgdar its too much toooo much !!!

Im only 18 ! I cant anymore !

But still, I promised you guys a post. Sorry it's a bit short. Inshallah a post tommorow. O lw ma gdrt, e3tharooni o inshallah b3d bkrah.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

7beebty tbeen Mc ?

Ay shay 7ayati.. aham shay ini m3ak al7een.

Ya ba3ad 3umri inti.

We pulled up to Mc and he went inside. He didn't want anyone seeing me so he asked me to wait in the car. I did as I was told.

He got back and we drove to an empty area and ate our food. All we did was stare into each others eyes. No words had to be spoken. It was all in our eyes. It was like we had our own language. Our eyes said it all.

After we ate he asked me to come back to his shalai. I hesitated. What if Farah woke up and couldnt find me. What if something bad happend ?

He told me his friends would be asleep and that it wouldnt be a problem since go around the back and just lye on the beach.

So there we sat on the beach staring out into the ocean.

Everything was so peachful.

The moon shone on the ocean making it seem so magical.

I sat between Fahad's legs, lying on his chest. He had both his arms around me with his head on my shoulder.

My heart wouldnt stop racing.

I felt so secure in his arms.

Everyonce in a while he was kiss my cheek.

I was blush and he would hug me tighter.

You have no idea what you do to me..

Heehehehehehehehehe..

7beebty inti wallah..

Fahoodi aby as2alik shay bs promise me you wont get mad.

Magdr az3al mnk lw esh..

Ok.. umm how many girls have you dated ? I promise I wont get upset.

7beebty thats the past. Im with you now.

Adri 7beeby bs aby a3rf. Please ?

*sigh* One.

Bs? Wow.. I was expecting more.

Why? Do I seem like that kind of guy ?

La bs e7sas Fahad.

Mmm...

Mind if I ask what happend ?

Theres nothing to tell really. Let's just say she wasn't the girl I thought she was.

Im sorry..

Whatever.. Yallah let me take you back.

The ride back was quite. He didnt even look at me or hold my hand.

I started to regret asking him that question.

Once he parked he just stared at the wheel.

I sat there for a while waiting for him to say something.

Wsh tstaneen ?

Huh? Oh.... nothing. Sorry.... night.

He immidiatly drove off at high speed.

I walked back into the house on my toes trying not to make a single sound.

But once I got back to my room I saw Farah there waiting for me.

I'm surprised I dont see any bruises.

Farah dont ok.. just dont.

Don't what ? Do you know how scared Iwas when I woke up and didnt find you ?!

Sorry.

Is that all you have to say? Sorry !!

Farah please Im not in the mood !!

I started to break down and cry.

My face started turning red.

My eyes started to swell.

That always happens when I start to cry.

She ran over to me and pulled me into her arms.

7beebty ! Bismila 3leeki wsh feeki ? What did he do to you ?

Mdri wsh saweetlah Farah mdrii !!!! I just asked one simple question and he turned on me !!!

Shhhh.. 7beebty calm down. Here drink some water. Go change and wash your face oo ana broo7 asaweelna chamomile tea.

This girl really is one of kind. She could have easily left me to drown in my tears, but she pulled me up.

I honestly dont know what I'd do without her. I think I'd be lost.

After I washed up and changed I found a messege on my phone. It was from Fahad.

Sorry I seemed a bit cold but that question triggered something in me. Just never bring it up again. Goodnight.

A bit cold ?

What am I gonna do with him ?

He keeps giving me these mixed signals that I cant figuire out.

Yallah.. sh-sawi 3ad. Inshallah 5air...

Nasty Comments

2010-06-06T12:05:00.000-07:00

Anonymouse..

With all my respect..
Sorry lw mu 3ajbk 6reegat el qu9a bs ana 3ajebni.
O lw mu 3ajbek laish t'39ben nafsik tgreen ?
O ana al7een ma glt shay '3ala6 3an nas elkuwait.
And FYI.. I am Kuwaiti.
Fa lwsama7ti gbl ma tgoleen shay, et2akady 3al ma3loomah.
So please if you have something nasty to say, keep to yourself next time.
Mala 3adi tnkateb 3al blog.

As for my loyal readers I love you all so much and I hope your all doing well with your exams ??

Allah ywafegkom my darlings :)

Shedo 7elkom !!

And the next post shall be dedicated to blue lillies.
Thank you so much 7beebty.
Today was so not my day bs laman shft el comments is made me giggle a bit and it really did put a smile on my face. ;**

What Fate Holds For Me 10 B.

2010-06-06T07:10:00.000-07:00

1 Week Later

Deema had already left to New York to start her internship, so it was just me and Farah.

It wasn't bad really.. I mean we managed to have fun. It was summer after all and we had the beach.

So Farah and I decided not to stay int he city for another minute.

We packed our bags and headed to the shalaih.

Not knowing how long we'd stay, we practicly packed our entire closet.

Farah's parents rarely go to the shalaih, so we had it all to ourselves.

This was going to be great.

A change of scenary.

Once we arrived we unpacked and got settled in.

We arrived at a good time, before 1. So we decided to take a little cruise on the jet boat.

Farah drove while I sat back and relaxed.

We turned up the music and took it all in.

Suddenly the boat starts to slow down and the music stops playing.

Did you forge to put gas in ?

Farah: It was a tank full I swear !

Aghh !! Look at where we are !! Were in the middle of NO WHERE !!

Farah: Hey don't blame me ok !

What are supposed to do now ?

Farah" Oh! Did you bring your phone with you ?

Damn it !! Why didn'y you ??

Farah: Well............. cause my guy would never force me to carry my phone everywhere I go !

You dont have a guy ok so shush !

Farah: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP !!!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP !! IS ANYONE OUT THERE !!!!! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP !!!

HAVE YOU GONE INSANE ???

Farah: What else is there to do Hadeel? Wait ?

That would be the more appropriate thing to do.

Farah: Apropriate? Oh my god were in the middle of no where and she.... wow you know what nevermind. Fine you wanna wait, we'll wait.

Luckily after an hour..

HEY HEY OVER HERE !!!

Two jet ski's came over to us and stopped.

They offered to take us back to their shalaih since it was near by, and then drop us by car back to out shalaih.

...: So you girls just make yourselves comfortable and feel free to roam around the kithen. Our friend just arrived so were gonna go open the gates for him.

Oh sure no problem.

Farah: Wow.. this is one fancy place.

Yeah mashallah..

Farah: They seem like nice guys.

Very cute!

Farah: Haha can I have one ?

Wsh da5alni ana ? Haha go crazy girl !

Farah: What about.. oh right you already got your man.

C'mon Farah! Until when are you gonna act this way ? I really like Fahad and it's about time you start getting used to him cause he's not going anywhere !

...: Sorryladies. Let me properly introduce myself. I'm Haitham. And the guy that was with me earlier is Jassim but he had to leave. And thats *pointing behind him* Bader.

Farah: Hehe.. you sure Fahad's not going anywhere ?

Oh go to hell !!

Farah: Ummm Haitham Im thirsty.. do you mind if we go get a glass of water ?

Haitham: Yeah sure.. after you.

Farah: I love me a gentlman.

Haitham: Haha y7lelik.

So do you just have your ways of tracking me down or what ?

Bader: Excuse me ? This is all just fate.

Dont you talk to me about fate.

Bader: Ouch! She bites back too.

You know what I'm leaving.

Bader: Hadeel wait. Wallah Im sorry I was just joking around. But do you really hate me that much ?

I dont hate you. I just dont wanna be with you.

Bader: Who said anything about being with me ? I just wanna have dinner with you.

Dinner is just he first step.

So your telling me theres no chance at all for me to see you ?

Thats exactley what Im saying.

Farah: So umm you and Bader...

Haitham: Yeah were good friends ever since college.

Farah: Thats sweet.

Haitham: La wallah your the sweet one.

Farah: Hehe..

Haitham: Farah..

Farah: Yeah ?

Haitham: Can I get your number ?

Farah: Sure.

Farah was thrilled.

It's been over a year and she never even thought about dating.

But there was something about Haitham that made her say yes.

Sometimes men have that effect on you.

You cant put your finger on it, but its an effect so powerful.

When we arrived back at our shalaih I checked my phone and found 24 missed call and 12 messeges.

They were all from Fahad.

I quickly dialed his number.

WHERE THE HELL WERE YOU ! DO YOU KNOW HOW SCARED I'VE BEEN ?!!!!!

Bismelah! Elnas ygolonn el salam 3leekm !

Im sorry.. what did I tell you ? Always have your phone with you.

We were riding the jet boat so I didnt take it with me.

Ah your at the shalaih ?

Eeh with Farah.

Ana ba3ad al7een Im on my way to my friends shalaih.

Well have fun.

Shfeek barda ?

Mafeni shay.

Embala feek shay.

Nope.

Ana lazim aroo7. Atfaham ma3ak b3deen.

Twenty minutes after he hung up, he sent me a messege.

I wanna see you tonight ;)

I could not believe the messege.

He finaly wants to see me.

I was beyond excited.

I immidiatly called him and we arranged everything.

I gave him directions and we settled on 1 am.

Farah is an early sleeper. so 1 would be perfect.

I couldnt wait !

I was relieved I brough half my closet with me.

Now all I had to do was figuire out what to wear.

I decided on dark skinny jeans and a sleevless white top. A see through white cardigan, and gold short gladiator sandals.

It was also a good thing that the shalaih was big and that Farah's room and mine weren't that close to eachother.

Farah: He still didn't call me !

You gave him your number 2 hours ago. How desperate do you think men want to seem ?

Farah: Hadeel he's so handsome mashallah. His eyes! His everything!

Ok slow down. Dont put high expectations now. You barely know him.

Farah: Atleast I meet men PROPERLY in REAL life. Unlike some people I know...

God your so immature!

Farah: Im sorry Dooli bs I dont trust the guy.

You dont even know him !

Farah: Neither do you ! Have you even seen him ? A picture ? No !

Were just taking things slow.

Farah: Whatever Dooli do what you want.

Wow.. you know for someone I have so much repsect for.. 67ty min 3eeny.

Before she could even say anythig back I stormed out of her room and went straight into mine, and locked the door.

I didn't wanna look at her for another moment.

She was being so rude and selfish.

She's supposed to be happy and there for me.

All she's ever done is slam talk Fahad.

And that's something I will not allow.

There was only a few more hours left until it was time to see Fahad.

I decided to take a little nap.

12:00

I woke up and took a nice warm shower.

12:15

I dryed off and blow dried my hair straight.

12:30

I started to get dressed.

12:35

I applied a bit of bronzer. My cherry lipbalm. A bit of mascara. I always mess up my makeup easily. So it sometimes took me a while.

12:45

I started to put on my gladiators.

I WAS READY !

1 messege recieved

From: Fahoodi

7beebty I couldnt wait.. I'm right outside ;$

I sprayed a bit of my favorite perfume, Narcisco Rodriguez and made my way down the stairs.

All the lights were off and Farah's bedroom door was closed meaning she was fast asleep.

I slowly unlocked the door and headed for the gate.

My heart was beating faster with every step I took.

I was finaly gonna see Fahad.

Although it was a bit sudden but I was still excited.

As I got closer to the gate I could see a black car.

I slowly opend the gate and got out.

I was surprised that he didnt get out of the car to greet me or open the door for me.

But I didn't let that bother me.

I could barly see a thing.

All the windows were tinted.

I walked around to the other side of the car and stopped.

My hands were holding onto the handel but I was too afraid to open it.

But before another thought could get into my mind, he opend the door for me.

I backed away as the door swung open.

I still couldnt see his face.

It was 1 am, everything was dark.

Nawya tet5leen ?

Hearing his voice over the phone was one thing.

But hearing it now, with him being infront of me was a total other thing.

Eeh...

I slowly got in and closed the door.

Here I was.

Sitting next to Fahad.

In the dark.

I was afraid.

Why did he want to see me?

Why now ?

In the middle of the night ?

Why not properly, like during the afternoon ?

Shfeek 7beebty ?

Mfeni shay...

Embala feek shay.. your not yourself.

Im fine...

Msta7ya ?

Lah..

6al3eeni..

I turned my head to look at him.

He was beyond words to describe.

Beautiful dark chocolate hair.

Big light brown eyes.

Sharp nose.

Lucious lips.

He was perfect.

At that very moment I think my heart skipped a beat.

Perhaps even two beats.

It wasnt because of his looks.. but because I was actualy with him.

It was all starting to become real.

Before, yes we were together but it didnt make sense.

Now here I am, sitting next to him.

Everything was finaly starting to fall into place.

Mashallah.. Mashallah tabarakallah bs.. tdreen wsh tsaween feeeni ?

Sorry..

3a6ni eedik. I want these hands with me always.

Inshallah..

La mu bs inshallah... inshallah meen ?

Inshallah Fahoodi.

Ahhhh.. wallah ra7 tmawteeeeniiiiii !!

Bs 3ad..

Sta7eeti ?

Eeh..

Fadeet eli tsta7on wallah. Hal 5dood mdri wsh ra7 asawi feehom. Mmkm a3th-hom ?

FAHOODI !!!

3yoon Fahoodi ..

Ma a7b hathal kalam !

7beebty inti knt amza7.

Ok..

Wain tben tro7een ?

Im actualy kinda hungry.. Farah and I had a little fight and I was in my room the whole night.

Wla tz3aleen 7beebty al7en nmor njeeblik akl.

He took both my hands and kissed each of them.

I was on cloud 9.

When he took my hands.. when he kissed them.. it was one of the most best feelings I've ever felt.

He couldnt stop staring at me and I couldnt stop staring at my hands in his.

What Fate Holds For Me 10 A.

2010-06-05T05:06:00.000-07:00

I decided not to bother with what happend yesterday.

So what if he bumped into me? It is a small world.

I'm sure I'll see him alot.

Deema's plane was delayed a couple of days.

She was arriving tonight.

Farah and I decided to surprise her back at her house once she arrived.

We were dying to know the good news.

The suspense was killing us!

While at her house waiting for her, Farah was flipping through some magazines while I was on the phone with Fahad.

I honestly dont wanna talk about it Hadeel..

Fahoodi please.. I really wanna know.

What did you just say ?

Fahoodi...

Ya 7beebty wallah..

Yallah 3ad la t-thye3 el mawthoo3.. please tell me..

Why do you wanna know so bad ?

Im jus curious and I want an answer. Which is what I would gladly give you if you were curious about anything.

Theres nothing to tell. I was ready to tell my parents about her, till out of no where she tells me to never call her again. She blocked my number and everything else. She broke my heart.

7beeby wallah I'm so sorry. Tstahel a7san mnha..

I have you now..

And Im always gonna be here.. mm mind if I askw hat her name was ?

Lulu.

I felt so bad for him.

I've never been heartbroken before but I could imagine.

Lulu didn't deserve him.

He deserved so much better.

A few minutes later Fahad and I ended our call and I went back to Farah.

Farah always had my back on anything.

But for some reason she wasn't too happy about the idea that Fahad and I were becoming close.

And I knew Farah, she would do anything, absolutley anything to protect me.

A year ago she was dating this guy whom she was madly in love with.

I've never seen her so happy.

Until one day she herd that he got engaged to somebody else.

She was heartbroken!

From that day she promised herself to never let that pain happen to either one of us.

Me. Deema. And herself, again.

I would always assure her that everything was fine, and that Fahad was a realy decent guy.

She always nodded along.

But like I said, I knew Farah.

Then finaly!

Deema walked in and broke the awkwardness..

Deema: YOU GUYSSSSSSSSSS !!!

Farah: We've missed you !!

Sit sit sit !!

Deema: God I have so much to tell you! So many pictures to show you!

Start off by telling us what the big news is !!

Deema: Well..............

Us: WHAT ??!!

Deema: I got an internship in NewYork !!

Farah: Oh.. we thought it was about a guy.. well congrats 7beebty Allah ywafgk.

What? No no no !! You cant move ok you just cant !! I'd prefer you get married !!

Deema: Dooli 7beebty enti wallah.. It's just for three months !

And what if they promote you ?

Deema: They'll have to accept me working from here.

Farah: Our little girl is all grown up.

Deema: It's just the New York Times you guys.. 3adii many people get to intern.

Yallah 3ad bs goli el7mdelah! Many would kill to be in your shoes right now!

Adrii you want action.
TRUST ME there is gonna be gonna ;D
Soon inshallah bs mthl ma Hadeel has to wait just a bit, so do you ;**
Part A has nothing adrii, bs part B will.
Now your wondering, "well then why did you write part A?" right ?
Well, so that you guys can get worked up a bit hehe..
Inshallah part B tonight.

Love you all ! ;**

Oh wait.. ummmm is it just me or do my comments keep getting smaller and smaller ?:(
Mdrii wain ra7o my readers ! :(
Me now very sad :(

What Fate Holds For Me 9

2010-06-03T05:59:00.000-07:00

7abaybe wallah into !! ;**
I was planning on posting yesterday night.
But I ended up staying REALLY late at my friends house.
So I sleptover at her place and couldnt write a post.
But as soon as I got back, which was an hour ago, I quickly jumped into the shower then logged in!!
Oh do you guys know the horror movie "Orphan" ?
Well everybody says that I shouldnt watch it.
That it'll keep me up all night thinking.
That it'll play tricks on your mind.
You know, the usual horror movie after talk.
Well I saw it yesterday and NOTHING!
I didn't get scared, not even one bit!
El filim sa5eeeeeeeeeeeef !! ;s
The only thing I liked about it was the adorable little daughter.
Her beautiful golden curs. And most ADORABLE smile!
Wallahi ana agool ehya el ba6ala mu el um.. waih el um terfa3 tha'36y !
Hehe t7amast zyada 9a7 ?

I love you all !!
Tadroon shkthr ?
Ktheeeeeeeeeeeer !!
Ktheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer !!
Ktheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeer !!
KTHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEER !!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow.. I can't believe he remembered me..

?: Well I never thought I'd see you again.

Oh umm hi..

?: Hi.. so how are you ?

Good good, you ?

?: Great.. umm do you mind if I sit down ?

Actualy yeah I kinda do.. it's just that my mom's in the restroom and she'll be out any minute.

?: Oh yeah yeah.. don't worry about it, it's ok.

Sorry...

?: But you do kinda owe me..

Haha oh really ?

?: Since I helped you with your bags..

Wait a minute.. haha no one asked you to help me.

?: Yes but I was being a gentleman.

Ahaaa.. ok...

?: Oh c'mon why are you so hard on me ?

Haha fine what do you want ?

Mama: Hadeel 7beebty yallah.

Yallah.. oh umm mama this is --

?: Hallah 5alty ana Bader Al. X

Mama: Ahlain.. is he with you at university ?

Bader: La 5alty ana mt5arej mn el jam3a..

Mama: Ah mashallah. Allah ywafegk inshallah.

Bader: Ameen ya rab..

Mama: Yallah Hadeel.

Saved by mommy dearest..

Bader: Hehe.. take care of yourself Hadeel.

Later that evening when we got home my mom sat me down.

She asked me about Bader.

She thought I was hiding a secret romance with him.

But I filled her in about it, that it was just something harmless.

He helped me and Farah with out bags and walked away.

She contantly kept accusing me that there was something more.

She also starting commenting on Bader's looks and how beautiful our kids would be!

I barley know the guy and here she is talking about the future!

Shes just too adorable I could never get upset from her.

Mama your so.. oh my god I don't even have a word.

Mama: Can you blame me if I want my ONLY child to get married.

Oh yeah I can picture it now.. oh yeah sure kids. Daddy and I first met when he helped mommy with her bags in the parking lot.

Mama: Why do you always have to do that ?

What am I doing ?

Here I am joking with you, just joking! And your taking it all seriously.

Your right mama.. I'm sorry.

We waited for my dad who brought home icecream from baskin robins.

It started to get late so I excused myself and headed to my bedroom.

I changed into my purple mini nightgown and switched on my laptop to check my e-mails.

Just as I was about to open my first e-mail, Fahad calls.

I decided to play it smooth and answer aftr the fourth ring.

Ahlain.

Fahad: Hallah 7beebty kfk ?

Good. You?

Fahad: Much better now that I'm talking to you.

Awhhh..

Fahad: Shfeeki?

Nothing.

Fahad: Ahhhhhhh ok I see what your doing here.

Excuse me ?

Fahad: This is the tiny silly stuff you girls do.

Huh ?

Fahad: Yallah 3ad Hadeel don't act dumb. You know exactley what I'm talking about. Stop trying to play it "cool" and jsut be yourself with me. La tkoneen thageela ma3ay. Mani '3abi o afham zain. So just be the Hadeel I know. Stop acting silly.

I'm just tired..

Fahad: A555 wsh ra7 asawe feek ana? Hmm?

Wsh saweet al7een ?

Fahad: Ba3ad 3umri wallah.. fedait eli ydala3ooooooon !!!

Hehehe...

Fahad: Eeeeee thats what I wanna hear. That adorable little laugh.

So what did you today ?

Fahad: Wallah abad.. saw a movie with the guys then dewania.

Oooo what movie ???

Fahad: Five Minutes of Heaven.

Hmmf!

Fahad: Shfeeki 7beebty ?

When will you take me to see a movie ?

Fahad: Y7lelik wallah !!!! Inshallah soon.

How soon ?

Fahad: Gltlik inshallah soon. Kl shay eb wagta 7lo..

Hmmf!

I got so jelouse of his friends.

They get to go to the movies with him, but I dont!

They get to laugh and talk with him, but I dont!

They get to drive around together with him, but I dont!

They get to do EVERYTHING with him, but I dont!

That's it!

I know I havent known him for that long but I desperatly wanted to see him.

I didnt want anything physical from him, but I just wanted to see him.

I dont care if we didnt even shake hands, but I just wanted to see him.

To have him infront of me.

This isnt fair at all.

He's seen me.

He's been near me.

And I was such a blond fool for not noticing anything around me.

Now it was my turn.

I wanted to see him.

I had to.

But when will "soon" get here ?

Agh fate what on earth do you hold for me ?!

What Fate Holds For Me 8

2010-06-01T14:29:00.000-07:00

Sam7oony my pretties.. adrii 6awalt 3leekm KTHEER !!
Bs I love you guys so much and Inshallah wa3ad bkrah there will be a post..
A continuation :)
;********

That night we talked for hours.

It's diffirent on the phone.

I've gotten to know him better.

Turns out he just graduated from university studying law.

I have to admit, i was pretty impressed.

There was something about his voice.

It got me hooked deeper and deeper every time he uttered a word.

I started to picture him while we talked.

Tall.. broad shoulders.. sharp 5leegi nose.. strong muscular arms.. dark brown eyes.. beautiful soft dark hair.. and best of all.. his dirty beard.

I fantasized about meeting him..

Seeing him for the first time.

I so wanted to ask to see him, but then what would he think of me ?

He told me I was like no other girl.

Polite and decent.. then what would he think of me ?

I just had to wait and see where things lead us.

Like I said before, the word patient isn't anywhere in my vocabulary.

The next morning I woke up with a big smile on my face.

I was happy, really happy.

Talking to Fahad always put me at ease.

I quickly pulled out my phone from under my pillow and checked my messeges.

There were already two from Fahad.

9ba7 el 5air 7beebty ;**

7ayati wallah lesat-ha nayma.. yallah 3afya gomy.. i miss you :(

Now my cheeckbones were in pain mn kthr ma Im smiling.

Isn't he the sweetest ?

I immdediatley called him, but he didn't answer.

I hate it when that happens, you call someone all excited, then they dont answer.

And its never the sam once they call back.

Oh well, I washed up and headed downstairs for breakfast.

My parents were just sitting down to eat.

Baba: Good morning princess

Morning baba and mama.. so whats for breakfast ?

Mama: Chocolate chip pancakes.

Mmm!! Now I dont wanna go back to uni anymore.

Mama: 7beebty inti hahaha.. bl3ax you should be thrilled. Your finaly gonna graduate and get your own place --

Away from you and baba !!!???

Baba: La 7beebty we'll always be here for you.. bs WHEN your ready to move out and have your own place....... shhhhh Hanah!

Heheheheh sm3tee baba 3adel mama ?

Breakfast was perfect.

We laughed and joked around.

I forgot how much I missed home.

Since I was with my girls the whole time back, I decided to spend the day with my mama.

We decided to go to cartier and see their new collection.

Im head over heels in love with cartier.

And I knew mama was going to get me something, wether I wantd it or not.

She spoils me so much.. Allah la y7rmni mnha..

So we went into cartier, unfortunatly nothing caught my eye.

But mama had to get me something, anything.

So she got me a wallet.

Ive had this LV wallet ever since my first year at univeristy.

And ever since Ive bought it, mama had been trying to get me to change it.

She absolutly hated it.

In her words, "I wanna burn it and bury it deep in the bottom of the ocean!!"

Now she got her wish.

Right infront of her eyes I started taking everything out of my LV wallet and putting it into my new Cartier wallet.

Mama got her wish and smiled with power.

We then went for a late lunch.

After we payed the check, mama went to use th ladies room.

So I stayed seated and waited.

All of a sudden i feel a light tap on my shoulder.

I couldn't believe it, it was him.

Was this a sign ?

Should I say yes this time ?

Wait what was I thinking ?

We didn't even speak yet, and here I am planning everything.

No..

Yes..

I dunno !

God I'm such a mess..

Wow.. I can't believe he remembered me..

What Fate Holds For Me 7

2010-05-27T14:16:00.000-07:00

STUPID connection!!
I wrote this post 3 days ago !!
It wouldnt post :''''(
We just installed a new much more faster line :D
Enjoy the post you guys.
And many juciy surprises await you ;)
I love you ALL ;******************

Did that really just happen ?

Did Fahad just call me up in the middle of the night ?

No no, I must be dreaming.

I really thought I was, till I woke up the next morning and checked my messeges.

They were all from Fahad.

This was actualy happening.

Sba7 el 5air yal '3alya.. awal ma tgomeen send me a messege;**

Deema was away for the weekend with her parents.

So all I had was Farah.

I was so confused and scared all at the same time.

I needed her.

I needed her to assure me that everything was going to be ok.

We had breakfast at her place then spent the rest of the afternoon watching movies.

Farah: So what are you gonna do ?

I was hoping you would have the answer to that.

Farah: 7beebty wallah I wish I did but this is something your gonna have to decide all on your own. It's your choice wether you wanna block Fahad out of your life or keep him.

But what would you do ?

Farah: I dont know, I mean I'm not anywhere near your situation so know.

Im scared.. he exposed a side of him last night that terrified me.

Farah: Try not to think of it in a negative way. Think of it as something sweet.

Sweet? The guy called me up at 4 am ! The afternoon would have been a much appropriate time.

Farah: So tell him that !

I will.. just as soon as he calls me. I already sent him a message when I woke up. All I gotta do now is wait.

And that's exactley what I did.

I tried to not over think about it all and just enjoy my day with Farah.

Deema was coming back tommorow and she has something important to tell us.

We were on our toes dying to know the big news !

Later that night I got home to find a huge surprise waiting for me.

When I walked into the living room I found my parents. But not just them.

I found Sul6an sitting there talking to them.

At first I thought he was telling them about Fahad.

But the minute they saw me a smile appeared across their faces.

All except for Sul6an.

My parents told me he was here to see me.

So we excused ourselves and headed up to my room.

Sul6an: So... Fahad...

What about him ?

Sul6an: Tell me about him.

Ok your joking right? The other night you stormed out of here furious and now you wanna know about him. Whats the catch?

Sul6an: No catch. I just wanna know about the guy who's dating my cousin.

Were not dating. We talk. As friends.

Sul6an: How did you meet ?

Umm that's really non of your business.

Sul6an: Ok then I'll guess. He sent you anonymous e-mails and you fell for each and every one of them until he seduced you onto msn.

What the --

Sul6an: It's the 21st centuary sweetie. That's how things work now.

He isnt a bad guy. He's kinda and caring and .. well yeah...

Sul6an: Why are you so quick to defend him? I didnt say anything against him.

Why are you here Sul6an.. If your here to poke fun then please leave.

Sul6an: I just wanna know how you could invite some stranger into your life in a blink of an eye. You barely know this guy.. forget what he's told you. But do you really know him ? You've never seen him. You never know.. he could be lying about everything and just be one of those guys looking for a good time.

If he was then why would he keep me around for over a month? If I was just a game, he would have made a move along time ago. You dont know him, so dont act like you do.

Sul6an: Im just trying to look out for you. I love you too much to see you get hurt. *sigh* Did you give him your number.

Yes we've herd eachother's voices.

Sul6an: What happend to the girl who was against all this crap? Who called it all bullshit? Who wanted nothing but to focus on her studies? Who the only people in life that she wanted were her family and friends? Where is she? Cause I dont see her anymore.

It's not like I planned any of this Sul6an. It just happend. And Im glad it did. Fahad is a good guy. He cares. He listens. He's sweet. Whatever! So what if I met him online! Maybe this is my fate.

Sul6an: Do what you want Hadeel, I just came here to tell you what I think.

M kan la da3i but thank you. I can very much take care of myself.

We sat in awkward silence for a while and then he left.

I went and washed my face, brushed my teeth and wore my comfy victoria secret pj's.

They always did the trick to help me relax.

I got out my laptop to check my e-mail, when my phone started to vibrate.

It was Fahad!

My heart started to race like a beating drum.

I started burning up.

I blasted on the AC to the extreme.

And counted to three...

Hello ?

Fahad: Hallah wallah.. hallah wallah bl '3alya.

Ahleen..

Fahad: Shfeeki 7beebty ?

Mfeeni shay.. I've just had a long day..

Fahad: Mmm.. so tell me. Wsh saweety? I wanna know everything.

Wallah abad. I was just with my friends. We stayed in and watched movies.

Fahad: Did you have fun ?

Eeh el7mdelah.

Fahad: Hatha aham shay 3ndi.

Umm.. did you get my message?

Fahad: Eeh 7beebty I did. Sorry I could text back or call but I had an exhausting day.

Everything ok ?

Fahad: All is fine. Oo 7ata lw feeh shay you dont have to worry about anything. I just want you happy and relaxed.

Awhhh.. thats sweet.

Fahad: Walaw..

And here starts the awkward silence.

Fahad: Haha tawna eb awal mokalema 7beebty. It's gonna take a little time for us to get used to it all. Bs aw3adek ra7 etkoneen sa3eeda 6ool ma enti ma3ay.

Oh.. wait so were an item now ?

Fahad: I hope we are.. but I dont wanna pressure you. If you just wanna stay friends ana 7athir. Aham shay ma athee3ik min 7ayati.

Haha stop with the lame chick flick lines..

Fahad: La t-thay3i el mawthoo3.

I do like talking to you.. but I'm just a bit scared.

Fahad: Afaaa.. scared from me?

From the wholw situation were in. It almost seems too good to be true.

Fahad: 7beebty el wa7ed egool el7mdelah o bs. I want you to give me a chance, give us a chance.

Mmmm.... ok. I'll take a leap.

Fahad: We'll both take a leap together.

POSTED !!

2010-05-25T07:41:00.000-07:00

You guys I posted PART 6 but its not on the top of the list.. ;s
I have no idea why..
Anyways it's under the dedication post and above part 5..
I love you all ;***

Dedication to my precious S ;**

2010-05-15T03:11:00.000-07:00

Inshallah a post tonight bs I just wanna dedicate this post to my sister.. my best friend.. my other half.

I hurt you I know. I did something you asked me not to do, I know. I did it behind your back which is even worse, I know. I should have told you, I know. But I was trying to protect my sister. I guess I just took the wrong approach.

I feel terrible. I couldn't even sleep last night. God knows how I did on my exam.

I want you to know that everything I do, I do for you. Maybe it was a bad move, and I'm sorry. I guess I thought I could fix everything and make it all go away.

I realize now that you don't always need me and your strong enough on your own. It was not my intention for things to go down the way it did.

I only hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

Always know that enti '3alya 3ndi eb shkl mu 6bee3y..

Oo a3zk marrah ! O0 lw 9arlik ay shay mdrii wsh ra7 asawii.. !

S I love you so much and I promise to never repeat what I did.

Inshallah rabii kateblik kl el 5air.. o inti eb 9alatii dayman ..

I love you..

My friend.

My sister.

My other half.

Allah yrtha 3leeki sam7eeny o ray7eeny min hatha el jaw el barad el foog ra9ii..

Allah yrtha 3leeki ...

;****************************************

What Fate Holds For Me 6

2010-05-15T03:08:00.000-07:00

I'M BACK :D
AND OFFCIALY GRADUATED !!
I'm so happy !
I never though this day would come !
Adri ini 6awalt 3leekm bs I had to focus on school, like I told you all before it was the last week..
El7mdelah 3ala kl shay.
Bs please ed3olii ya 7abaybee :)
Tadroon shkthr Ive missed you all ???? ;***
You have NO idea !!
Thank god I'm back and I really hope you guys enjoy the post..
Adri it's kinda short bs I'll try and post later tonight.. bs lw ma gdrt, inshallah bkrah :D
I LOVE YOU ALL AND AGHHH IVE MISSED YOU !!!! ;***
A7BKMMMMMMM !!!

Ok maybe this isn't such a bad thing.. oh who am I kidding this the absolute worst thing that could ever happen to me !

Sul6an knew that I wanted nothing close to a relationship.

He knew that all I wanted to focus on now was my last year at uni.

He knew that all I wanted were my friends and family. No other attatchment what so ever !

And then he see's this.

Farah assured me that everything was going to be ok.

He would eventualy calm down and call me.

All I had to do was be patient.

The only problem is that the word patient isn't anywhere in my vocabulary.

A week went by and I hadn't spoken to Sul6an OR Fahad.

Sure Sul6an had a reason for not speaking to me, but Fahad ?

He was being immature and childish.

Every night all I would do is go online and wait for him.

I figuired he blocked, till finaly after midnight he logged in.

long time no talk fahad

yeah well ive been busy

since when? your always on at midnight ;s

the world doesnt revolve around you hadeel

waih shfeek 3alay ?! ;s fahad you cant possibly be upset from that

from what ?

me not giving you my number !

bullshit hadeel !

ok now youve gone too far ;s talk to me zay el 3alam wl nas ow wallahi al 3theem ra7 asaweelik block and delete !

is that a threat ?

hell yeah !

badeena medat lesan shayef

mu g3da amed shay fahad bs inik ur acting so immature.. kefi i dont feel relaxed giving you my number... atleast not just yet

ok

so can we please just put this all behind us and move on.. min jd shay ma ystahel za3al

;******

lol i'll take that as a sorry ;p

;)

Fahad and I went back to talking everynight.. and with each night passing I started to like him more and more.

I loved talking to him.

I couldnt wait to get back home and talk to him.

As weird as it may seem, I would sometimes not log off and keep the volume to the max just incase he signed in anytime during the day.

I felt like I could talk to him about anything.

I wanted to give him my number but I was scared.

Ive never done anything like this before.

It almost seems too good to be true.

Could someone you meet on the internet be safe ?

I wanted to talk to him, get to know him more.

Then if things go the way I plan, then I will let him in deeper into my life.

But what about his ex ?

What if he still has feelings for her ?

He seemd pretty upset.

Was it regret ?

Does he miss her ?

This is what he did to me !

I still haven't herd his voice yet and I'm over thinking !

I'm going insane...

One late night after a night out with the girls, I was exhausted.

I could barely move.

We had a long day of shopping and all I wanted to do was sleep.

I didn't even bother to remove my makeup or change.

I just threw myself onto my bed and doveright into my dreams.

A couple of hours later at around 4 am my phone starts to vibrate.

Usualy vibrations never wake me but my phone was in my pocket so...

Hello ?

...: Hallah wallah

Sorry but I think you have the wrong number...

...: La la I absolutly have the right number.

Listen ana mani fathya la hathal 7arakat fa goodbye.

...: Yallah 3ad Hadeel

What did you just call me ?

...: Hadeel el '3alya

Who the hell is this ?

...: Guess hehe..

Goodbye

Fahad: La la wait wait hahahaha Hadeel it's me Fahad !

W-w-wha-what-what ?

Fahad: Haha sorry I know it's late.

Fahad how on earth did you get my number ?!!!

Fahad: If a guy wants something he can get it in a snap

Just like how a girl's reputation and get ruined in a snap !!

Fahad: 7beebty la t5afeen I would never allow anything to happen to you. Hatha wa3ad meni ana.

I told you I wasn't ready togive you my number and you go and get it !!

Fahad: I have a friend who works at STC so I gave him your name..

I don' care Fahad ! What you did was so shady and Im so angry !

Fahad: Wallah Im sorry I didn't want to bs I couldnt help myself.. I needed to hear your voice.. please sam7eeny

Asam7k ba3ad esh ? You already did the action !

Fahad: Hadeel please..

Im gonna say goodnight now Fahad.

Fahad: Listen your exhausted now. Rest, and tommorow I'll call you.

Ya rabiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii !!!!

Fahad: 7beebty please la tz3aleen meni..

I'll be fine.. nshoof bkrah wsh y9eer.

Fahad: Goodnight 7beebty.. sweet dreams..

What Fate Holds For Me 5

2010-05-14T05:22:00.000-07:00

umm im sorry bs .. no ;s

aha..

plz la tz3al bs taw el nas bdrii o we barley know eachother fahood

hadeel we've been talking for hours each and every night.. we know eachother inside and out.

im sorry bs i dont think ts such a good idea.. ur still a stranger to me.

aha i see.. a stranger ? inzain ana i have to go now.

yallah 3ad fahood dont be like that.. mala da3i hathal 7araka

i said goodnight hadeel

And just like that he signed off.

I was furious.

He was causing a conflict mala da3i.

9ayer shway daloo3.

Wsh tha ?

La wallah ma 3ndi ketha.. ha..

I erased him from my mind and went to bed.

The next day I woke up to find Sul6an downstairs sitting with my mom.

Turns out he was just stopping by to deliever something his mother asked him to.

When I saw his face I smiled.. I thought he was here to see me.

But after what had happend why would he?

Sul6an: 9ba7 el 5air..

Hey..

Mama: Nzain Sul6an why don't you join us for lunch ?

Sul6an: Actualy 5alty I was hoping me and Hadeel would go out to lunch.

Huh ?

Mama: Akeed laish la2. Hadeel ro7y lbsii 3adel.

Sul6an: Yallah na6rik hehe..

So he was here for me.

I have to say I was surprised.

What could he possibly want from me ?

I quickly rushed upstairs and wore the first thing that hit my eye.

Knee length shorts and an orange top with a white kinda see through cardigan.

We had an amazing lunch.

It's like nothing ever happend.

We talked about everything and catched up.

He made me laugh so hard that I actualy teared up.

I needed this day, this lunch with Sul6an.

After lunch we decided we would go back to my house and watch a movie.

Mama wasn't home so we had the 9alah all to ourselves.

I made us some popcorn and popped the movie in.

We would watch Katkoot.

I loved that movie.

Egyptian movies are one of the things eli ygdr yws3 9adrii..

This movie was one of my favorites.

All of a sudden he gets up.

Sul6an: I wanna go see your room hehehehe ..

Oh my god it totaly changed since last time you saw it .. malik salfah yallah bs sit back down !

Sul6an: La2 ana aby aroo7...

Haha inzain yallah hurry back down

He was gone for over 5 minutes.

Does it really take that long for a simple peek ?

When he finaly did come down he seemed diffirent.

His expression totaly changed on me.

He said he had to leave.

I asked him what was wrong, but all he said to me was that he didn't feel too well.

He was fine just a second ago.. I sensed something wasn't right...

I walked him to his car and watched him drive away.

He didn't even say goodbye.

I cleaned up the 9alah and went up to my room.

The first think that captured my eye was my laptop.

It was on turned on.

I immediately dialed Fara7's number.

Sul6an saw it all !!

Fara7: Whoah whoah .. saw what ?

He knows Fara7, he knows !!

What Fate Holds For Me 4

2010-05-12T05:15:00.000-07:00

I know it's short you guys.. bs I promise a longer one tommorow :)
ILY all so much !!! ;**********

That night...

LOL !!!

your too too cute !!!

hehe.. so now do i get to know ur name ? ;(

mmmmmm...

yallah 3ad I wanna know who im talking to..

say please ;p

pretty please with cherries and whipped cream on top !!

fahad

(( Yes mimi-7 it is Fahad ;p haha kan eb balii mn zaman ;** ILY ))

fahad... fahad... fahad :D

lol shfeek ?

bs mani m9adga inah u finaly told me ur name.. it wasnt that hard !

so is your boyfriend ok with you talking to me ?

la la lat 6ale3 kalam min aflam al7een ;p

ahaa zain ashwa ma 3ndik .. la koon g3d athye3 wgtii...

lol ...

The days went by and Fahad and I were speaking more and more.

From the very begining my plan was to get his name and end it.

But I couldn't.

When we talked.. we actualy talked.

He listend.

He gave me advice.

He made me laugh.

He made me smile.

He was sweet.

He was caring.

He was not what I expected at all.

One Month Later...

I still hadn't told the girls about my late night conversations with Fahad.

I was afraid they would judge me since they know I'm against all this.

It was time.. they had to know.

I couldn't handel keeping it in so long.

Farah: 7beebty you know you can always come to us.. for anything..

I know bs I was afraid you guys would judge me ...

Farah: Are you happy ?

Yes.

Deema: 6yb 5ala9 hatha aham shay !

Bs I really like him. Y3ni I can't wait till the end of my day to get back home and talk to him.

Fara7: Maybe that's not such a bad thing. Sometimes the weird can be good.

Deema: Hahahahahahahahaaaaaaa weird !!

Bs what if he's just playing ? What if I'm just a game ? What if he doesn't feel the same way I do.

Fara7: What if what itf what if !! Stop asking questions and go figuire them out !!

That's you guys excusing me right ?

Y7belhooooooooooom !!

I rushed home.

I even ran a red light.

Thats what he did to me.

Fahad had this effect on me.

hey you !!

ahlain

how was ur day ?

ok

what did you do ?

dewania

anything intresting happen ?

no

fahood shfeek mu 3ala b3thek ?

tired

6yb 3alaqal give me a full sentence. I know your not ok.. talk to me please.

my girlfriend called me today

oh...

well my ex girlfriend

mind if i ask what happend ?

we broke up 2 years ago so i was surprised when i got her call. she wanted to meet up.. catch up. bs i said no.

im sorry ?

its ok. forget about her. im sorry i took it out on u.

3adii 7ayatii dont worry about it

7ayatii ?

lol sorry it just came out ;s

lol dont be.. nshallah ra7 etgoleena dayman ;p

ummm.. ok ;$

fdait eli ysta7oon ;**

hehe..

can i ask u something ?

sure

sam7een7 bs can i have ur number ?

What Fate Holds For Me 3 B.

2010-05-09T04:32:00.000-07:00

We started talking on msn.

Everything seemed normal.

He seemed like a normal guy.

We talked for about an hour until I had to go meet the girls.

Yet he still didn't give me his name.

This time I gave him an excuse, but the next time we talked... I wouldn't.

During dinner I couldn't focus.

Words would go into one ear and out the next.

All I wanted was to know what F stoof for.

Not like it would change anything... but I needed to know so bad.

So that night we talked.

you know your one tough guy to figuire out

and your one though girl to find

speaking of which how did you ever see me ?

well to be honest i go to a completly diffirent uni, i was just there for the day with a friend of mine.

wow lie number one should got slammed fast. when's lie numbet wo showing up ?

hadeel im sorry.. i just.. i dunno.. forgive me?

so you saw me around campus and asked about me...

i asked a friend of mine who asked his friend who's a girl.

so this girl do i know her ? who is she ?

that i cant say.. i cant answer either question. sorry.

so then what university ?

regents.. now please enough with the questions. we have plenty of time to get to know one another.

sure

so how was your day ?

it was good, i went and had dinner with a few friends.

where ?

maki

lol i was there too

didn't you say you were in london ?

yeah but im in kuwait now for the summer ;p

mmm..

mm inty ;p

lol ;$

listen i gotta go now but i'll see you tommorow right ?

yeah

awal ma tgomeen sign in !!

lol ok ok !

yallah goodnight yal '3alya ;*

night..

That nigth before I rested my head on my pillow I started to wonder.

Wondering about Fahad.

I mean what did fate have planned ?

I always looked down on people who befriend someone online, yet here I am one of them.

Just as I was drifting off to sleep my phone vibrated from underneath my pillow.

I wondered who could be calling at this hour.

It was Farah.

Farah: I can't sleep !

3adi yallah bkrah ry7een el shalaih

Farah: Eeh bs magdar anaaaaaaaaaaaam !

Mmmm.. ooh did I tell you ?

Farah: WHAT ?

I was at my grandmothers house and Sul6an caught me sneaking out the back trying to avoid him !! Fashlaaaa !!

Farah: Hahahahahahah !! Ra7amtik wallah I can just picture it !

Oh god... it's him !

Farah: Who him ?!

Him him ! Sul6an ! He's on the other line !

Farah: Answer !

I was surprised to see his name on the screen.

He usualy never calls, especialy not at this time of night.

Just as I was slowly getting over the fact that he caught me, he opened it up.

Sul6an: You shouldn't have to be embaressed you know.

Put yourself in my position and then think about what you just said.

Sul6an: Hadeel I just wanted to have dinner with my cousin that's all. And If I did anything to make you think otherwise then I'm sorry. I'll be careful with my words next time. And I know it's late bs I just had to tell you. Didn't want you to sleep bothered.

Oh you have no idea how glad I am to hear you say that ! Weew !

The next day I woke up bright and early to go shopping.

I hated shopping in crowds.

It disgusted me.

I like it when its calm and peacful.

When I don't have to fight throught to get an item.

When shopping I always liked to go alone.

No one attached with me.

Taking my time without someone's shoulder over me.

I would meet up with the girl's for lunch afterwards.

But before I went I just signed into msn to say goodmorning to F liked I promised and that I was going shopping and would talk to him later that night.

I had to many bags to carry that it was hard for me to walk all the way to my car.

Then out of no where this guy come's along and carries my bags and puts them in the back seat of the car.

He was gorgeous, just gorgeous !

He was tall and muscelar.

What I love most in a man are dimples and arms.

And he had them both perfectly made.

Shkran wallah ma ga9art y5ooy.

: 3afwan wallah it was my pleasure.

Well ummm bye...

: Uhh so where you heading off to ?

I've got plans with friends.

: I'm sorry and I know this is a little too forward bs ---

Oh.. umm I'm sorry. But I'm just not dating anyone right now.

: Oh ok.. no problem. You take care now.

What was wrong with me ?

He was a perfect gentelman and he was cute !

And I still refused.

Once I got in my car all I could think about was getting back home and talking to F.

I wanted to know his name, to know him.

What Fate Holds For Me 3 A.

2010-05-08T02:42:00.000-07:00

The next day was just another typical Friday.

As always we would all gather together at my grand parent's house to have lunch.

I was planning on not going but once I herd Sul6an wasn't going I decided to go.

Facing him will take time.

The lunch went great but moved very slowly as usual.

I felt like I was in a car ride that just wouldn't stop.

I loved my family and all but Friday's mostly consisted of bordom.

During lunch my grandmother asked me to get an extra plate from the kitchen.

So I did as I was told.

Just a few seconds later I hear a familiar voice.

I couldn't really make out who it was but it was definitly familiar.

Putting the plate down I snuck half my head out the door to get a peek.

With a huge gasp I pulled myself back in.

No way !

No way !

No way !

They all said he wasn't coming.

What was I to do ?

No way was I going to go back out there.

Not now.

I wasn't ready to face him.

It's a good thing I didn't bring a handbag or anything with me, Just my cell phone.

There was a back door in the kithen leading out to the garden, which led to the driveway where my car was.

I managed to escape.

Sul6an: Tisk tisk tisk.. sneaking off in the middle of lunch. Now I'm just disappointed.

Hehe... I didn't know you were here.

Sul6an: Oh but you did. I saw you pop yor little head.

I'm sorry ok.. I shouldn't have treated you the way I did. You didn't deserve any of it.

Sul6an: So then what's going on with you ?

I'm afraid that you have.... feeling's for me.

Sul6an: Ok your joking right ? Please tell me your joking. Hadeel I love you yeah.. but your my cousin. My sister. That's all there will ever be. So don't worry, your safe.

Oh gosh, now I feel like a complete ideot...

Now run along little one and I promise not to say where the little piggy has run off to.

That was probably the most humiliating thing that has ever happend to me.

But whatver right ?

I brushed it off my shoulders and headed back home.

My mom called yelling at me.

But I just made up an excuse that I was tired.

Bored sitting on my bed, I decided to see if F had left me another e-mail.

Ma radeety 3alay ams.
3asa ma thayagtik ?
Wallah asfa sam7eeny..
Shaklii 3aref jawabek..
Ra7 a5aleek..
Radeety 3alay awal marra o 6amanteeny inah intii o shkran.
aham shay hatha 3ndii..
Allah ywafgek eb 7ayatik ya Hadeel..
Ma3al salamah..

- F

Ok he just kinda broke my heart right there.

What's the harm in just talking to him ?

He seems pretty decent to me.

Oo byan inah m2adeb.

Hey.. sorry about not replying yesterday.
I'm just not used to these sort of things.
I'm still a little confused as to how you got my e-mail and where you saw me.

I was hoping you'd reply soon :)
I know your not used to these things and I don't wanna put any kind of pressure on you.
Like I told you before, I've seen you around campus.
As for your e-mail... well were guys we know how to get what we want fast.
But don't worry LOL.. your safe with me.

- F

Aha...
So what does the F stand for ?
You still haven't told me who my secret admirer is.

Oh you'll know soon enough...
Listen why don't we move this over onto msn. Much easier, don't you think ?

- F

Umm yeah sure.. msn... see you there...

I wanted to know who he was so badly.

This guy was practicly obsessed with me from his words and I wanted to know who he was.

Why was he contacting me ?

What more does he want to say on msn ?

Really, what does fate hold for me ?

What Fate Holds For Me 2

2010-05-06T14:39:00.000-07:00

That night I logged onto my email.

I recieved an anonymous message.

Hadeel wallah ma tdreen shkthr wagt a5athnii 3ashan alageek..
Mu ga9dy a5awfek m3 hathal rsalah.. bs lw feeni kan jeetlik al7een..
Shftek eb London el shahr eli fat.. o mo9er inah aklmik..
bs kl ma shftik sta7ait wallah..
Shftek hatha marra eb kl makan.. 9dfa wallah..
A5eeran lageetik..
Mub lazim trdeen 3alay.. bs a5eeran 3rfty ana meen o kalamtik..
Hatha el shay eli knt abeeh..
Sam7eeny yal '3alya.. o tsba7een 3ala 5air..

- F

I couldn't sleep that night.

Constantly having the laptop next to me.

Just as I would almost click the reply button, I'd quickly stop myself.

I mean what am I even thinking ?

For all I know this guy could be some crazy nutcase who escaped from a mental institution!

But I have to say, I was flattered and kinda blushed while reading the e-mail.

Nothing wrong with that.

Finaly I decided to delete the nonsense e-mail and go to sleep.

The next day I had my dinner with Sul6an.

But that wasn't till later.

So I decided to go out and have lunch with my mom.

God I missed her.

She was always there for me when I needed her.

She truly is my inspiration.

The one who helped me follow my dreams and make them happen.

She's my mother.. my best friend.

She isn't that old too you know.

She had me at a young age, straight after she got married to my dad.

People think were sisters when they see us.

My mom.. honestly no words can even begin to describe her.

A rare jewel, that's what she is.

Mama: Doolii yallah 3ad bs bala sa5afa.. wsh thal tafkeer el fathyy.

It's not mama !! Wallah this isn't like him. It's been 2 years since I've seen him, 5air wsh yby.

Mama: La 7awl wala qoowat ela bellah.. your being paranoid. Stop over examining everything. Like you said it's been 2 years since he's seen you. He just want's to catch up.

Yeah.. maybe your right. Let's order.

Maybe my mom was right.

Maybe I was just over examining everything.

I tend to do that alot.

I began to get ready.

I wanted to wear something causal yet stylish.

Scared that if I wore something too formal he would get the wrong idea.

I wore a pair of long black leggings and a loose flowly thigh length black top.

Ok I'm not emo or anything but I just love the way black looks on me.

I aaccesorized with a pair of small diamond earing and a a bunch of long gold necklaces.

I looked so chic, along with my hot red heels.

It wasn't formal.. not too much. Just perfect.

Sul6an: Wow you didn't need to get all dressed up for me.

I didn't.

Sul6an: O..k... so anyways how's London. I wanna know eveything !

Not much. College that's all. Why do you care anyways ?

Sul6an: Cause I care about you.

Mmm...

Sul6an: Are you ok? You seema bit off ?

Will you just get off my back and stop caring so much ! I'm fine ! Agh !

Sul6an: Ok seriosuly I've had it. I dont know whats going on with you but do not take it out on me. I just wanted to have dinner with my cousin. This entire evening has been hell !

Sul6an wait dont.............. leave...

I over examined again didn't I ?

Well I can't help it I this is me.

This was not how I wanted the evening to go at all.

I got home and started remembering what went down.

I cannot believe my attitude towards him.

He did nothing what so ever to deserve my crap.

I have to apologize to him, but how can I face him after tonight ?

This was all messed up.

I need to see a therapist.

I need medication.

I need the mental institution.

I snapped out of my head and came back into reality.

Cuddeling into bed I opend up my laptop to check my email, like I do every night.

I was shocked.

It was the anonymous F again.

Didn't he say he wasn't going to talk to me again ?

Hmmm...

Hallah Hadeel.. darii darii ini ga6a3t klmatii bs ma gdrt wallah.
Y3nii 6ool thal wagt oo ana adawr 3leek o alageek.
3alaqal bs rdii 3alay 3ashan a3rf oo at2akad inah intii.. ma aby aftha7 nafsii.
Allah yertha 3leeki..

- F

This time I replied.

I had to.

The boy is dying inside.

I put myself in his situation and what I would have wanted.

I felt sorr for him.

There is no harm in just assuring him that it's me.

And if he crosses the line I can just easily block him off my hotmail account.

Simple as that.

You can be assured that it's me. And thank you so much wallah I'm flattered and all.
But this just isn't my thing. Talking to strangers, especialy anonymouse strangers.
If you don't mind me asking, can I please know your name? I wanna know the person that's stalking me ;p

He instintly replied back.

A5eeran radeety 3alay.
Shnu stalker haha I wouldn't call it that.
I would just say... a secret admirer. ;p
How's Kuwait ?
Don't worry I didn't stalk that far.
I herd inah you were going there for the summer.

- F

LOL !
A secret admirer huh ?
Well I'm sorry to have to let you down but like I said I don't do this kinda thing.
Anyways thank you so much for your e-mails, really I'm flattered.
But this has to end here.
tc :)

What if I don't want it to end ?
I mean I saw you. But you could just as easily see me.
I'm sure you haven't missed me around campus.
Anyways.. I really don't want to stop talking to you Hadeel.
Is there any way ?
I'll follow any rules and stay away from any red lines.

- F

I know what I was about to do was wrong.

And if Fara7 and Deema were here they'd probably slam my head against the wall.

But whats the harm of just talking to him for a bit ?

Just for a little bit ...

What Fate Holds For Me 1

2010-05-05T00:47:00.000-07:00

Ahh you guys I'm really excited to be starting this new story !! :D
I really hope you guys like it and get hooked on it !!
I love you all and I wouldn't have reached this far into my 5th story if it wasnt for you guys !!
So thank you !!
I love you all so much !! ;** _______________________________________

It was finaly summer!

I was finaly gonna go back to Kuwait.

God I missed it.

My friends, my family.

Sure, I love London but I missed home.

I missed my warm bed.

I missed the family gatherings we had every Friday night.

I missed those girl talks with my best friends.

I missed everything.

I wish I could just drop everything and go back but I couldnt.

I've worked so hard to get to where I am now.

Throwing all that way would just cause disappointment to those I love.

Everything was perfect for me in London.

I had a beautifuly furnished two bedroom apartment.

A maid that comes in everyday to clean.

Both my parents made sure I was taken care of.

Plus I had my own car, a Porche Cayene.

It was gorgeous !

I got it just before I moved to London.

It was dark red on the outside, and a beige cream color on the inside.

I just loved the smell of leather !

So I was finaly going back to Kuwait for the summer.

Kl el 3arab jayeen 3ala London oo ana eli rada elKuwait. Hehehe..

I've got my tongue all mixed up.

My dad's Saudi and my mom is Kuwaitii..

Bs most of my family on both sides speak najdii..

I packed up my things and was all ready to go.

God I missed the shalaih.

The sea was my getaway.

I'd wake up in the middle of the night and just lye under the stars listening to country music. Which I love by the way.. so much!

I was finaly home..

Mamaaaaaaaaaaaaa !!

Mama: 7beeebtyyy el7mdelah 3al salamah !!

Babaaaaa agh I missed you both so much !!

Baba: 7beebty wallah we missed you more.. everything is waiting to see you back at home.

Laaa I don't want a big family gathering.. not now.. not today !

Mama: 7beebty they missed you..

Uff fine..

I was finaly home.

Before entering our house I took a moment to take it all in.

Looking at the place where I grew up..

It's been a year since I've been home.

But it seems like even more.

Everyone practicly jumped me the second I walked in the door.

Anymore and I would have suffocated.

Salamt 3ala my family and I told them about London and university.

They were all so happy for me, I just had one more year to go.

I was finaly going to be an artist.

I've loved painting ever since I was a little girl.

Just a hobby. I never planned on turning it into a career.

Hopefuly I'm planning on opening my own gallery.

Ahlain Sul6an..

Sul6an: Hallah wallah bl '3alya.. Kefik ?

Tamam wallah o ent kefik ?

Sul6an: Dam enah your here 5ala9.. Hadeel nawarat el Kuwait wallah..

Haha y7lelik.

Sul6an: Wsh 3ndik elyoum ?

Ra7 ashoof Fara7 oo Deema.

Sul6an: 5a9ara wallah knt aby a3asheeki ..

Tommorow night ?

Sul6an: 5ala9 it's a date..

I started to get ready for our big girl's night out.

I took a warm hot shower and started to apply my makeup.

I had no clue what to wear.

Even though I had a huge walk in closet.

It felt like a tiny cabinet.

After twenty minutes of messing up my enire closet I finaly picked out an outfit.

A white mini floral dress with a bunch of red flowery prints.

Wore my hair up in a high ponytail.

And ofcourse my new gold Chanel ballerina's.

Fara7: Trust me you haven't missed a thing. Your the one in London so tell us !

There's nothing much to tell really. This year has been crazy with studying. I need this summer to kick ass !

Deema: It will ! Raz7 nkoon bl shalaih most of the time.

Perfect!

Fara7: So any guy news ?

Haha I wish! La wallah.. I mean there's been some eye flirting but that's it. I don't even have time for a relationship now. Maybe in a year.

Deema: A year ! You must be joking !

Well unlike some people I can controle my urges and not date TWO guys at the same time !

Deema: Well what can I say.. *sigh* their both great men. I'm just taking my time to see which one deservs me more.

Fara7: El7mdelah oo el shkr...

Don't act so innocent Faroo7. How many times have you been on and off with 7amani ?

Fara7: Hey I didn't say I was proud..

Oh but get this. Today I saw Sul6an and he was a little weird.. He kept this constant smile on his face while talking to me and he invited me out to dinner tommorow.

Deema: Hadeel he's your second cousin and he wants to take you out on a welcome back home dinner. What's the big deal ?

I dunno.. it's just that something didn't feel right. I got chills up and down my spine when he said dinner.

Fara7: Maybe your developing feelings for him.

I talked to him for one second. And we've known eachother since we were kids. That's not how love at first sight goes.

1 Message Recieved

Hadeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeel !!
Meshtaglik wallah..
Have fun on your girl's night ;**

Fara7: Ok why are you staring at your phone k2anik mafjoo3a ?

Something just isn't right...

That night I logged onto my email.

I recieved an anonymous message.

Hadeel .....

The Other Man 33 FINAL

2010-05-01T13:00:00.000-07:00

It was Msh3al all along.

It just took me so long to see it.

To believe it.

Although, I dont regret Bader. I dont think I ever will.

I loved Bader and he was a huge part of my life.

He also brought me here, to this place.

To the place where I stand now.. with Msh3al.

I will never forget Bader.

He will always have a place in my heart.

I don't think I ever stopped loving Bader.

But Msh3al was mine.

He always was.

What man would stand by you through all this ?

He never left me.

He had many chances to get up and just walk away but he didnt.

Mahma 9ar, we were always husband and wife.

Bader understood why I had to stay with Msh3al.

He told me that he wasnt surprised and that he knew exactley what was going to happen on the plane.

He took both my hands and looked me deep in the eyes and told me he understood.

And he let me go.

I know it wasn't easy for him. I could see it in his eyes.

This time he was finaly ready to have me, to have all of me.

But he was in Msh3al's shoes this time.. and he finaly let go of me, all of me.

Do I wish things were diffirent ?

That answer I dont think I'll ever know.

My whole life was a mystery.

A puzzle waiting to be solved.

A case that would never be closed.

I dont know what the future hold's but what I do know that it will forever be with Msh3al.

Me: So get this.. I go to the doctor's office and guess what...

Msh3al: What ?

Me: I'm pregnant !!!

Msh3al: .............................................................

Me: Msh3al.... baby..... baby...... ooooooookaaaaaaaay... so I've left some water next to you here.. so wheneever your ready...

THE END !

You guuuuuuuuuuys !!
I really dont want this story to end :'''(
I love it !!!
It gave me such an amazing feeling whenever I start to write it..
But everything must come to end right ?

But I do have great news for you all !!
I already have a new story created.
Inshallah I'll be starting it soon. I promise you by this week the first post will be up.
I still havent thought of a title though.. but I will soon :D

I really hope you guys enjoyed this story..
Did you ?

I love you all and I wanna thank each and every one of you for supporting me through out this story !!
Your comments have really kept me going !!
I love you all so much !!! ;******************